just editing some posts here

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere, the troll's "last post" thread

the goblin felt he had to explain the situation for those who had just arrived, saying "...actually, here I am helping this poor brit learn the three "R"s of trolling, namely roast it, rubbish it, and rub salt in, unfortunately his grasp of reaching anything beyond the basics of beer and boobs seems challenging now..." so the goblin just suggested that he remained grasping those two then

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere,

a writer should amount to something

"...wrong again, a writer writes for himself, moreover, someone who is anonymous doesn't even try to amount to anything, he just tries to get "it", whatever it is within him that is, "out" in these posts as near to the mark as possible..." replied the goblin, as if knowing that at the end, his very last post so to speak, it would be exactly the same for him as when he had first started, "...ok, so what reward should I be seeking here, see how cheap it sounds too, no, neither those trappings of dailylife nor these trinkets of the moneygod interest me at all, listen then, I'll say it once clearly, "my posts are all dead by the time I have hit to send button", so you amuse me with your assumptions but clearly you do not write from what you have written there, you don't know that all engaging feeling of following one's train of thought with a pen, simply you may leave this temple when you can stop snatching popcorn out of my hand but that's not amounting to something...", and with that the goblin wondered if there was some sort of "tomb of the anonymous goblin" somewhere, sure he would need it after reading that "a writer should amount to something" idea again, "...help, more anonymity, and quick please..." he cried, quickly double-checking his mask once more

56 181http://www.forumsforums.com/3_9/misc.php?do=whoposted&t=68805 1342

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

"...so what real difference does being liked or disliked make on forumland here..." asked the goblin of himself then, continuing "...where in the end, the tally remains one's posted content against one's duration upon it, so yes, people that I don't know might pass their comments, but what of it really, after all, they know they have their own tally to deal with now, and yet a million put downs from unknown anybodies can't compete with that one accusation within oneself of ok, so they might think whatever, and say whatever too, but what has one actually posted in one's own right for the time that one has been here for that is the only self truth in this anonymity where all here is just transient anyway..."

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

evening now, and the muse just looked back at the goblin, repeating , "...no, never write for others, you know that much I guess, just a post has to be something like all or nothing ..." her voice was deliberate now, continuing "...simply you alternate between the vision and its explanation each time, where if you write it's simply a repetition of that isn't it then, you walk between those two states each time, where one has to experience the vision for oneself to its full on the one hand while then being able to explain it to those who can't see your vision on the other...", just the muse was reiterating here that those who wrote lived between these two states as if in some shared life perhaps, so the goblin repeated the muse's pact back to her again exactly in the way that she had first told him all those many years ago, remembering her then too, she never aged, and saying with his smile back at her again "...goblin our little pact goes honesty, a shared life, and a thick skin...", and smiling back with the goblin's reply ready she replied, "..."and what's in it for me muse" you actually asked me didn't you now...", to which the goblin remembered himself, as she continued "...it never changes goblin, that journey to self in each moment, your journey through here then, for what else could you possibly want, and besides what else is really yours to keep anyway...", oh yes she could be most persuasive

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere, the woman's interests "last post" thread, weightloss again

the goblin often wondered if a diet was ever the right way in life, saying "...surely a diet is just an excuse to not change ones basic eating habits while one is not dieting that is, any decision should be long term then, not "I am dieting now" or worse "I will diet this all off later", more "I need to think out my lifestyle here", so if eating is habitual change those habits, if it addictionnal keep food out of arm's reach, if it is release don't let it build up in the first place, but we are aware of all this already and ignore it thinking one can just diet it off later, so a diet in effect becomes a loan from the "excuse bank" here for the wrong lifestyle perhaps..."

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

looking back, the goblin wondered if it actually mattered all these years later then, where those politicians had settled out of court in some faraway country across the water from switzerland where he lived, and yet all that water under the bridge still seemed murky, as if those great moments of nixon's downfall and of clinton's impeachment seemed somehow betrayed by this "gore/bush election result" and by the political horse trading that followed in its wake, so the goblin simply asked "...well then, was it or wasn't it rigged, and will the voters ever get to learn the truth of it today, for whose democracy was it if it is decided by the parties themselves rather than the voters..."

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

the goblin had lost the plot for the sub plot again, saying "...cunning little critters these sub plots are too, you think you know what it's all about, the answer to it all, etc., and then suddenly something happens and those sums don't add up anymore, as one just realizes one has been had by one's own complacency towards the real plot again, and how the sub plot mocks one here...", while outside the bistro, a cool post rain morning on the goblin's day off just casually echoed this sentiment to him once more, "just another day like any other in rat race city" then, with yet more "start line births" for some people, and "finish line deaths" for others, where for the rest of us there was ever this ongoing track between those two lines then, with umpteen hurdles of sub plots to meet on the way, where somewhere in all this was the real plot then something that was ever elusive as if laughing at one here, perhaps hidden in full view even

61 186http://www.forumsforums.com/3_9/misc.php?do=whoposted&t=68805 1421

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

"...pick up the sword goblin, give me one good reason why I just don't kill you straight off then..." she wasn't joking too the goblin knew and as "queen of the amazons" she must have killed many men, and other women for that matter, and now she so resembled a tigress at this point, beautiful yet deadly, and as any true woman she either loved or hated, "...I know that you can kill me easily o great queen but all that you've heard about the eldorado ladies restroom, with that large stage sized mirror rimmed with those theater lights, where below it are endless bottles of hand lotions, creams, perfumes, crayons, lipsticks, all rested neatly above a marble wash basin to matching pink walls, where again a bookshelf filled to the brim with books by "mills and boon" and babara cartland, together with an uncountable number of catalogs of shoes, clothes, and fashion brands to browse and purchase await, yes o great queen, it's all true, but that's only part of it, there's a free telephone, a television, and the computer to do msn chat on, a "sound around" stereo system to listen to other women like britney spears, madonna and bananarama, even a kitchen alcove to stew jam and bake cakes in, oh and a catflap to let ones favorite pet come and go as it pleases, and so so much more o great queen if you would just care to join me that is...", which was, more or less, the way the goblin wooed his wife he remembers now, knowing that one had to truly appreciate a woman's priorities before one could actually approach one here

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere, a "last post" thread

what do i win

"...one wins a sudden realization coupled with sadness I suppose, just the knowledge that there would be no more posts from that point on..." replied the goblin welcoming xxxxx, though continuing "...for me, I cannot think of anything that really equates to being able to post throughout life one's journal here, or what one would wish for in exchange of this ability to post now, yes I try to win each time yet I never try to win outright for that prize would merely be a consolation prize by it..."

60

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

"...ah ladies, a man will never tell you that he actually loves you for your imperfections then, while you will never believe it for the simple truth it is, even when he tells you clearly that it just is, so instead he just tells you that you are perfect, which rightly you don't believe either, where he's just hoping that it will somehow appease you with a lie which of course won't appease you..." mused the goblin adding almost in a whisper and a wasted breath "...proximity and time are all that matter here where men are concerned, they love you for your imperfections again, but you never believe men do you, so still you want to be some monotone perfect where each of your imperfections are what makes you so wondrous to him..."

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere, life's angels again

"...everyone thinks that they could have amounted to more then, overlooking what they have already amounted by now, simply, the very fact that they have survived till this moment is commendable, where living on is winning on isn't it..." mentioned the goblin, who could just as easily flog himself with those might have beens conjectures but preferred to throw them all back into that sea of speculation there, adding "...and yet, I wonder if I would have either seen or posted anything much if I had actually been satisfied with myself and my lot too, so tell me then, to what do I actually owe my awareness to here, to those good things in my life or to those bad things in my life, where didn't I really need both of those things to come this far and for my eyes to open..."

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

Who is fleamailman and why does he pop in here to post on one thread and then rush off??

"...well I could be anyone I suppose where I could have any number of reasons to post too, but in the end one just realizes that one can't know anything for sure on forumland, any more than one can prove anything either, simply one just does what one likes I guess..." replied the goblin, adding "...so what reason would you like me to give you and who would you like me to be by it, actually it's called virtual reality because none of it is real now, where nothing I could possibly write here would clinch it for you neither, but that much we know already, not that it matters anyway, where all that ever mattered was the words that got written out and those one might yet write too, so care to join me my inquisitive human, for here we could do posts more in tune with our own alter-egos behind them, simply one is who one is by what one posts here, well that's who I am for the most part..."

61 191http://www.forumsforums.com/3_9/misc.php?do=whoposted&t=68805 1463

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

the goblin wasn't so sure at this point, it was as if his very existence was a vortex of ever decreasing circles, diminished returns, and met expectations, no, not just for himself but for anyone who remained within its orbit, "...ah, that's your lot goblin, isn't that just dailylife as you like to call it, and how by now you know it well my little goblin yet that dailylife of yours was never the real point here anyway was it..." whispered death out of the shadows somewhere, adding "...so you've lost your barrings in all this dailylife of yours goblin, well then you only have to think of me here to know where and what the real game is at this point...", to which death continued with those some old lines of his again, saying "...ah yes, the rules again, well then let me explain, simply it's like hide and seek with me, I close my eyes and count on, meanwhile you have to figure it all out, as much as you possibly can, before I come for you, though the only thing is, and perhaps to make this game a little more interesting for us both, is that I don't actually tell you which number I'm counting to, nor what exactly you're supposed to find out here, while no doubt those two crooks of your distracting dailylife and that moneygod will try to waylay you to their own ends once more, in other words my friend, just think of this life as a "last post" game for real goblin, and let's see how you fare with it now..."

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere, the "this is islam" thread

You're at least partially correct; we can't win a war against Islamic Supremacists by employing only high tech weaponry against what are in most ways 7th century barbarians. We can win, but only by adopting to a certain extent their ways of waging that war and adapting to the conditions under which it must be fought. And, of course, reconciling ourselves to the fact that it must be a war of extermination. Note that "extermination" is not the same thing as genocide; consult a good English dictionary if in doubt.

"...done that, been there, where those americans only get themselves even more deeply hated by it too..." mentioned the goblin, adding "...step out of the box a moment, imagine that the cromwell was bashing away at those catholics in the manner that only the puritans could muster, killing men women and children left right and center, and then out of the blue the muslims show up, bomb the hell out of the puritans, installing catholics to run the show in a now united britain, and then they start saying they want regime change in france next door because the sun king is a dictator who treats his subject very badly...", which of course was the point where most people following the goblin's logic would conclude that the muslims were wasting their time because no matter how well meaning they might be, or however well armed too, they were outsiders and had no right to be there then, whereupon the goblin just smiled "...look, let them kill each other if they must then, but let's find full employment for americans at home, me I think you americans are being duped by a thief who distracts your attention with a faraway bogyman while sinking you ever further into debt through devaluation, so you tell me then, where's the real enemy of anything your founding fathers stood for, is it some twobit bandit from far far away, or those at the top who would enslave you further through devaluing that little money you have left then, btw where are your jobs now, where is your work security, what pension awaits, what do you vote for even, naah, no american dream left it seems..."

 

[luvs]

http://www.webmd.com/schizophrenia/guide/mental-health-psychotic-disorders

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere,

[footnote: the names used in the goblin's posts are fictional and chosen at random, any connection to persons living or otherwise is just coincidence]

"...and so, may we have the next contestant please..." the goblin smiled while the lights and camera turned to a new face smiling, she seemed a little tense but alert while he approached her, "...well hello there miss, and let's give a big round of applause for..." as the goblin moves the mike towards "...luvs..." she replies as the clapping starts and she shivers shyly the goblin says his ditty "...nice to meet you, to meet you..." as the audience shouts out "...nice..." the goblin continues "...ok, luvs are you alright, you remember the rules of our little game then, the curtains will open you have ten seconds to memorize everything you see, then we'll close the curtains and anything you can remember is yours, it's as simple as that, you're not nervous I hope...", she looks across to the goblin "...well flea a bit really, but I will do my best, promise..." and with that the great curtains open while the audience counts the seconds down on the clock "...ten, nine, eight, seven..." frantically her mind made a quick picture as her finger pointed to where the televisions, cameras, laptops, and the car were, somehow she knew she could win this "...three, two, one..." the curtains dropped together "...well luvs, the big question now, can you tell everyone what you remember then...", "...well goblin..." she starts with excitement and then bursts out "...there's that batwoman mask, that sensuous thin riding crop, the super sexy tight leather corset with uplifting cups, oh and those pointed high heals, that pair of handcuffs, and I think I saw a black hood with matching black swimming trunks for him..." the fingers of her hands clutch together in expectation to the goblin who, turning to the audience again, says "...oh and didn't she do well folks..." as, a bit confused, the goblin then dashes behind the curtain to check for himself just in case she was right

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

the goblin just said "...this dailylife and one's journey to self are two different things for me, the former one can accept as something which has a cut off point, as in "letting go", "a season for all things then", whereas the other is much more like a its namesake, simply a journey that doesn't end until one stops posting...", the goblin could never really stop his journey to self here now, if only because the thoughts came to him much like a musician hears music in the back of his mind ingrained after a practice session, he continued "...actually, none of this has any meaning in the context of the dailylife now, I mean, I am anonymous where there's no reward to this, the forums just come and go, their members too, moreover, these random threads are about the most impermanent thing that I know of, so it's all just a masked ball played out upon the forest of forumland, yes but once one finally comprehends that it is so, then what one actually does from that point onwards just reflects who one really is by what one does, which is reason enough to continue I guess..."

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

say it with roses

"...no no no humans, not roses at all, you need to send her an enormous bottle of beer, that's far more symbolic in my view and sends the message that you really do understand her inner sensitivities here..." mentioned the goblin at it

62

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere, the "mildly kinky or just perverse" thread

"...erotic morris dancing, church fate romps, party political pub crawls, and nude carol singing too..." mentioned the goblin with such fond memories now, adding "...ah yes, those were the days weren't they then, just britain at its best it seemed..."

62

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

the goblin reminded himself of something, saying "...members come and go..." but the goblin himself didn't mind who came or went or stayed, or whatever, no, for him only content mattered, "...selfish perhaps but as long as I am alive I will try for content as each post is proof of how I relate to my life..." explained the goblin, continuing "...but let's see it for what it really is, in that each one of us is actually alone on forumland with an unspoken tally known only to ourselves of what one has done against the time that one has had to do it in, so now, how does one other member here, or a million other members for that matter, change this simple equation in some way, no, this tally just remains a constant as some benchmark of self doesn't it, simply, in life one might well be "whatever", fair enough, but on forumland one is ever what one posts pure and simple..."

49

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere, from a woman's interest site, the "What are your non-negotiables" thread

"...if I could dry her tears, and make her smile, and give hope where others can't or won't, and hold her gently in my arms and promise "forever" to her from the highest heights and upon whatever one holds dearly to in life, defying man, devil, and even god by it, and only for a moment too..." the goblin paused thinking on it, then concluded the obvious by saying "...I would have known love where all before and after that one promise then would seem empty now, yes, that is the woman I seek, the one who could yet pall out that promise from within me, for what, or who else, could possibly matter bar that moment then..."

63 200http://www.forumsforums.com/3_9/misc.php?do=whoposted&t=68805 1653

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere,

Then eat poo and die

"...ah yes, our very own "poo life" as we know it then..." remembered the goblin who would have rephrased it more so continue eating this poo, or just die outright then, in fact, the goblin had woken up this morning feeling guilty, the dream once more had been about his not meeting expectations here and letting the side down, something that recurs often enough in differing forms during his sleep it seems, he retorted "...but surely as long as I'm paying my dues why should the rest matter so much to me, I mean why should bigger, better, and even more poo be what this life is all about, no, I'm definitely missing something here in that I actually prefer simplicity..."

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[luvs]

i read a line or two that named an un-named 'luvs'.. then i got bored. sorry, goblin. snooze is better than that.

 

[fleamailman]

i read a line or two that named an un-named 'luvs'.. then i got bored. sorry, goblin. snooze is better than that.

("...nothing to feel sorry about..." replied the goblin appreciatively, adding "...no, you're welcome to keep me company like this, so on with the show now, still got to edit them whatever the reception I guess...")

repost from elsewhere

the witchdoctor marked the money that had now returned to him again, saying "...see goblin, this way they always returns to me...", the goblin, who had been sitting nearby, didn't know what to believe but the logic didn't seem right at all, and yet here were those notes now, "...oh, it's not just money goblin, it's most things one wants and those one doesn't want even, I mean ever thought that it could be that "that those things you have now, actually sought you out", and that, "that those things you want now, are looking for you still", if so, then the question then is how to call them towards you, spells then, prayers perhaps, oaths even, so what do you think is really at work here my goblin friend...", the witchdoctor smiled as if remembering something, and then continued "...let me guess now goblin, my guess then is that your logic would have it that this blood here is to indent my memory of course, that this sacrificed animal was to jolt some deep feeling within me, and that the music together with the smoke was to elevate my mental state too, because that's what you see here of course, isn't it goblin, but in the end you're thinking that it is only me calling out for it to be, well maybe it is then, I can't prove anything to the contrary, but then again just look back at your own past goblin and count the number of times it has somehow seemed more than a coincidence that something has happened, as it has happened, when it has happened, and just when you seemed to have called deeply out for it too...", the goblin didn't directly reply to the witchdoctor who just continued dipping a lone finger into the warm blood again before touching each note in a slow deliberate manner, till eventually, with the last note that is, the witchdoctor just stopped, looked back across at the goblin again, and directly said "...you know goblin, the real difference between us is that your reason tells you that one can't just call something towards one, so you drown before the boat sinks in my view, whereas I keep calling everything towards me regardless of what my reason thinks..."

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere, the "what do you need" thread

the goblin had sat a long moment at his usual table in the quiet bistro, reflecting, trying to answer the question for himself then, somewhat fruitlessly it seemed, until he just answered it to himself, saying "...I need an awesome thought then, whose thought that is doesn't really matter, but anyway something to take me out of myself awhile and return me to myself uplifted and gratified, for "people" "places" and "things" are all transient to me, no, not because they are, which of course they are too, no, more because I am transient amongst them, simply I'm passing through this life now, we all are in fact, and at times I need to remember that simple need to step out of myself to understand my transience better..."

63

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere, the topic of infidelity

"...no she never really forgives, does she..." said the goblin "...though she might let it pass for a while that is, it will return between them again, these things always do you know, while he for his part lives in fear if he values her, or as some trapped fool if he doesn't, where mistrust, disappointment, regret, shame and a whole bunch of other inner emotions flog the backs of their relationship from that point on..." mentioned the goblin who would never confess it, nor repeat it, nor ever talk about it now, just that from somewhere inside himself he knew that she knew

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

"...so what are you thinking goblin..." asked the slot again, "...oh nothing really, well perhaps slot I'm just thinking that the taste of awareness in one's later life is often cold, bitter, and sobering then..." replied the goblin, adding "...in fact, I suppose too, that the biggest difference, between "me now" and " me back then", was that in my youth was all about "tonight", whereas these days it's more "tomorrow morning" which comes to mind..."

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[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere, the "is there an afterlife" thread

"...if one knows or cares too much about what happens after one's end, then "this life now" becomes reduced to what I wonder, some sort of cheap points game meant to curry favor with some power up there, so no and probably for that reason alone, I don't want to "know of", nor wish to "believe in", nor even "care about" anything that that my afterlife might hold in store for me..." the goblin stopped, then continued "...so my actions in this life are based solely upon their own merit now, something which hopefully you'll agree is more honest towards those actions, and towards other people around me too, than that cheap speculating over their consequences concerning one's future arrival in some heaven or hell or wherever perhaps...", simply the goblin's mind was harping back to that other line of his do you really need a reward to do good, and where of course a far more likely explanation here was that the afterlife actually played neatly into the manipulations of these "powers that be" here on this earth rather than any power that might appear afterwards, "...so no again, for me it's not belief nor atheism nor even agnosticism, simply I refuse to speculate, for I am here today, alone, honest to myself in each of my decisions, something both correct in itself and how it should be I believe..."

63 207http://www.forumsforums.com/3_9/misc.php?do=whoposted&t=68805 1694

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere

the goblin was just thinking about the man yesterday, the man who had sat across him at lunchtime that is, wondering if it really had been that something within the goblin now that had called the man towards him then, after all it just seemed another poignant coincidence after writing about the witchdoctor in his last post, the memory resurged again "...tell me, those six tattooed numbers, they are..., ...", "...real goblin, yes three and half years, two death marches between three camps then..." he just repeated the camp names but only auschwitz registered, continuing "...I'm czech myself, I was 15 when we were finally liberated in 1945...", he looked years younger than the 82 he had to be now, he laughed "... later the soviets made us enemies too, but I managed to leave legally, and now I stay in rather better accommodation it seems...", the best hotel in geneva the goblin noted, "...are you jewish goblin...", "...naah, I'm probably lutheran come church of england then, but it's like that joke barry humpries tells, you know "yes, I'm church of england cause I wash my car on sunday"...", "...well I wash mine on saturday then...", he replied not seeming at all religious, where the goblin wanted to ask so much more but convention was against him, so he just asked "...what did it teach you...", "...oh, just to live each day one at a time I suppose..." and with that the goblin changed the subject as was expected of him now, but something had transcended his dailylife again, so perhaps the witchdoctor was right then after all, perhaps one does call these things towards one as some things certainly seem beyond the goblin's norm here

62

 

[fleamailman]

repost from elsewhere,

I think that fleamailman is a very clever soul and must therefore be a woman............

the goblin felt it best to reiterate, saying "...I am a male, but if you have forgotten what a male is, it's a creature that silently locks itself into garden sheds thinking that no one has noticed..."

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