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Dargo's little girl needs our prayers

Brent, I have been watching this struggle from afar and I can say that my heart and prays go out to you and your family every hour of every day. I have no medical background but using past experiences from dealing with family members, I would suggest that you ask for a heart to heart with the doctors whenever possible. I know that you have already talked and expressed you anguish with them but badger them each hour of each day. I had a little brother that suffered a traumatic brain injury from a hunting accident a good number of years ago and we waited for change each day following the surgery. As time went on, we came to the realization the healing process with the brain can be very slow and so is the recovery time. It seemed like there is a huge valley that you must pass through, as the body try’s to understand and cope with what has happened. I know that the pain you feel is the indescribable sorrow and torment that a loving parent suffers when their child is in agony but (like my family discovered) going to another doctor or hospital may not help. We want so much to do something but most of the time, we are powerless to do much more than wait and trust those who are skilled in the field of medical care. As a parent, my heart goes to you and your family.
 
I would have never thought about you having any trouble in any hospital in that system. If I was you I would not quit complaining to everyone you see, everyone. Quality wise I think of them as top of the line. least I did.
 
mak2 said:
I would have never thought about you having any trouble in any hospital in that system. If I was you I would not quit complaining to everyone you see, everyone. Quality wise I think of them as top of the line. least I did.
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Clarian has a wonderful reputation around here Mark.
I surely hope something gets done about Melanie's situation, soon!
 
All I can say is that the hospital is lucky that ain't my girl in there. There would have been more than one Come-to-Jesus meeting by now.

Somebody owes you a good explanation why they don't see to be too anxious to attack her pain. Somebody owes you an explanation why dosage is being treated so carelessly.
Give 'em hell! :hammer:
 
My prayers are definitely with you and your family.

I've always found that if the higher ups aren't there or aren't willing to speak with you, the media can generally get a response. I would contact newspapers and or TV news and get them to talk to the people in the lounges.
 
mak2 said:
I would have never thought about you having any trouble in any hospital in that system. If I was you I would not quit complaining to everyone you see, everyone. Quality wise I think of them as top of the line. least I did.
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Thanks again to all who have posted. I only quoted Mark's post because it has been my understanding that Methodist Hospital of Indianapolis was my understanding. Unfortunately, I have found one glaring hole in their service; the holidays. It is painfully clear that this hospital has failed to insure that it is properly staffed during the holidays.

I do understand that people want off during the holidays. Really, I do. I would like to have had a holiday season, but I didn't get one. I am now in the process of moving Melanie to a hospital who has assured me that they make it a priority that their patients who are missing their own holiday season are not left unattended; especially on 3rd shift. I am no longer in Indy at the moment because I will not be able to contain myself if I either cannot find nurses late at night when my daughter is in pain and past due for her pain medication, or if I find them sleeping.

To be fair, there are some absolutely wonderful nurses who have cared for her. I cannot throw a blanket statement out that their care is terrible. However, I will go on record stating that they have a terrible problem staffing over the holidays and, in my opinion, that severely affects my opinion of them as a whole. They told me that I was being completely unreasonable when I said "it's not my problem" when they told me that they have to accommodate their employees' requests for time off during the holidays. It is my strong opinion that is their problem and it severely tarnishes their image.

Sincerely, thank each and every one of you for your kind posts. I need to run now to try to make this move occur tomorrow.
 
Thanks for the update on the move Dargo and I beleive it is the right one , You have enough on your plate without dealing with red tape or excuses . Best of luck & continued thoughts & prayers . :flowers:
 
Thanks for taking the time to update....if the move goes ahead i pray it happens smoothly and swift with little upset to Mel.

I hope this starts to get Mel the pain relief she so desperately needs...and peace of mind for you and your family.

Thoughts and prayers ongoing.
 
Dargo said:
They told me that I was being completely unreasonable when I said "it's not my problem" when they told me that they have to accommodate their employees' requests for time off during the holidays. It is my strong opinion that is their problem ..
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Hospitals are open 24/7. They need to have proper staffing on duty at all times, no matter if it is a holiday. Drs. and nurses should know that when they enter their field.

If they want holidays off, they should work in clinics then, not hospitals.

Good move, Dargo! Don't forget to take the remains of the basket with you. Don't want them screwballs eating Mel's chips after the (lack of) care she got from them.

As for the hospital? Shame on them!
 
Brent, I know nothing about the hospitals in Indianapolis and their quality, or lack of, but based on what you've written I'm glad to hear that you're moving Melanie out of Methodist.

I'm in total agreement that holidays are not the problem of the patient, but rather the scheduling problem of the hospital. They are there to provide health care and therefore they cannot allow their staff to drop below the level of service they NEED to provide. In your case perhaps their problem is they simply should not have done the surgery a few days before they sent their staff home for a long holiday. It would have been better for them to simply tell you that you'd get substandard care in their hospital due to insufficient staff, you could have then chosen a different hospital to have the surgery, one that would have been staffed during the holiday period.
 
Here is a tip Brent, if there was PRN pain meds prescribed, and the nurses were not giving them, go after the nurses and hospital. If there were no prn pain meds and/or call to the doctors go after both, like with an attorney. This is very simple black and white stuff, dont drop it, think of the next little girl in the same positon.
 
I am so very sorry that this continues Brent, and like many of us here, we have children and know well the frustrations when our loved ones are suffering. My unskilled advice would be to let the doctors do what they need to do. I do know that they walk a fine line with pain medications that can cause immeasurable problems if improperly administered. All our hopes and prayers are going out to you and your family.
 
Best evidence today suggest that if one is really in pain they do not become addicted to pain meds, no matter how much they take, while in pain. Most of us nurses that think about studies and evidence based practice realize this means if a pt states they are in pain, give them pain meds. Sometimes there are polysubstance abuses are call this into question and more studies need to be done. But with a young, post surgery neuro patient without ICP problems, pain meds should be given as requested. Anything else is grounds for a bigtime lawsuit. Most hospital staff arent allowed to say they are short staffed anymore. This is soo wrong on so many levels.
 
Thoughts and continued prayers sent your way Dargo . I dont think it does much good for any of us to say what we would do , You made the right decision IMHO . Theres plenty of time to make things right later on . I hope so very much for things to get better for you all really soon as I'm sure we all do :flowers:
 
Nothing to add but best wishes , my friend . Our hearts are breaking knowing Mel is hurting . God Bless
 
mak2 said:
Best evidence today suggest that if one is really in pain they do not become addicted to pain meds, no matter how much they take, while in pain. Most of us nurses that think about studies and evidence based practice realize this means if a pt states they are in pain, give them pain meds. Sometimes there are polysubstance abuses are call this into question and more studies need to be done. But with a young, post surgery neuro patient without ICP problems, pain meds should be given as requested. Anything else is grounds for a bigtime lawsuit. Most hospital staff arent allowed to say they are short staffed anymore. This is soo wrong on so many levels.
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I figured when they had stopped the Fentanyl, and started giving her Vicodin, that was a bad decision for one.

I can understand the short staffing, we in the health care field know that everyone deserves a break, but surely there should have been a doctor(s) appointed to look after her, and better nurses following orders OR even writing scripts for some BETTER pain management.

So Brent, how did checking her out of the hospital go and where have you taken her now?:doh:
My God, what a nightmare...:neutral:
 
After I made some calls to friends in high places and pulled in all of my favor markers, suddenly we got a pain management team who, after asking the same questions that had been asked for days, decided that she does NOT fit the profile of a drug addict. :hammer:

After this was established, they then began with several 'break through' drugs which included IV fentanyl and several other meds and then fentanyl patches for longer term pain management. They had the nerve to ask us why we had not requested this immediately post op. Um, I'd never heard of the drug and I sort of thought it was their job and NOT mine to prescribe drugs.

She seems to be at a lower pain level now than she has been since the surgery. I'm working on getting her moved to a hospital in our town since she needs to be an "in patient" while receiving pain management. Duh, we never expected to take her home the next day, but we also didn't expect to have all thes problems getting her some sort of pain relief.

I should know more tomorrow. I did hear mention that her biopsy sample could be getting old if it hasn't been tested yet. If that is the case and another sample is needed, I will completely blow my top and proceed only with a complete team of attorneys. I certainly hope not. The results of the biopsy is the key to how her illness is to be treated from this point on. We didn't miss the holidays and have the side of her head sawed off just for entertainment! Hopefully this is a turning point.
 
mak2 said:
Was the lab closed too?
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First thought that entered my mind, then I realized she had the surgery a few days before the holidays, so even if the lab got it the next day it was still NOT a holiday.

Honestly I'm shocked by what is happening. I suppose I could understand it if it was in a small town hospital that doesn't do this type of surgery but this is, from what I can tell, a pretty large hospital group with pretty good reputation and an established track record for providing care and doing more than just the simple things.
 
Thanks again Dargo for the update , glad to here the pain level is going down and you seem to have found a team of qualifyed people who finally care . Hopefully it be uphill from here on out and recovery will much quicker .

I dont know what to say about them dropping the ball on the biopsy results , but hopefully they didn't and the results will be good news . Continued thoughts and prayers for Mel and your entire familly :flowers:

Kudo's to you for holding it together in a very stressfull situation and handling it properlly , somehow I dont think many of us here would have had that control and more then likelly would have made bad judgements and only made things worse . :wink:

I know for a fact I would have snapped and without thinking done something really stupid , its in my genes :sad:
 
thanks for the update, my friend. i, too, am appalled at the crap that they had put her, and you, through with the pain meds, and docs on 'vacation.' doesnt seem right to me. still thinking of you all.
 
Here is hoping that the friend in a high place who got a pain management team has also gotten other things moving. It was expressed to them that I have absolutely no intention whatsoever to get any attorneys involved or begin any sort of litigation. However, it was also explained that I was not exactly happy with her treatment and that if I continue to feel that she isn't receiving the care needed, they should make double sure all of their documentation is in order.

Apparently last night was by far the best night she has had since surgery. She was able to get some rest and they kept on a precise schedule of keeping her pain level tolerable. To want "no pain" is unreasonable, and we all understand that. We also understand that writhing in extreme pain for weeks is not acceptable. Anyway, there has been such a huge change in her pain level that her blood pressure has returned to normal levels and we are moving her today. :clap:

Better yet, since her new medications are not administered via IV, it is possible we may bring her home to heal and visit a local partner hospital for any problems and follow up exams and to remove her staples when it's time. I hate that it took what was basically a 'hint' that I'd sue and sue in a big way if pushed to get things moving. Right now, I'm just thrilled that her pain level is down to what she calls a "6" on a scale of 1-10 and is likely coming home! The last thing I want is trouble and any legal issues! Maybe a gentle reminder about their service from someone they respect righted the ship. I'll be thrilled if that's the case.

Now I just need to hear about the biopsy results so we know how treatment will be continued. I was told her recovery is a journey and we just got delayed at a stage coach stop a bit too long during our journey. Obviously, I hope the remainder of the journey is smoother and ends the way we want; with a full recovery. Thanks again to all!!!
 
Good News. Brent. It' really a pain in the butt to have to force people to do their jobs, but sometimes it is necessary. I hope Melanie is doing better every day.
 
Well that is good news!! Now maybe all of you can get some much needed rest yourselves, now that your little girl isnt in so much pain
Keep us posted on the biopsy results.
Dont forget anything I can do for you here at home just ask
 
Brent it is great news to hear that Mel's pain levels are improving....to be at 6/10 is nearly half way there and i hope zero pain is not to far in the future....i am so sorry you have had to fight to get what should be common sense everyday patient care.

As you say this is going to be a long journey and you are still closer to the beginning than you are the end,but as each day passes you will get a little closer to Mel's full recovery, i just Pray the journey does not take to long and you do not have to have another delayed stage coach stop as you so polity put it.


Try and get some much needed rest for the journey that awaits you.....Mel and all your family are continuous in my thoughts and Prayers....you are doing your Daughter and family proud:thumb:
 
jim slagle said:
Brent, I'm so glad to hear some good news about Mel.

Jim
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Me too, glad to hear some positive news. Good luck with the move. Hope that works out for the better and you get her home SOON!!!!!!
 
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