Snowcat Operations
Active member
Recieved 12" in the last 6 hours and its still coming down! Bobcat and BigAl were having another one of there Loud and obnoxiuos Kristi KKK Meetings in my alley. They set fire to my fence. Dont ask how. I think it was when they were trying to syphon gas from my Thiokol. Bob was throwing up and Big Al was pissing all over my fence trying to put out the fire. Anyway as you can tell Im use to these Kristi shinanagins from the likes of Kristi Owners and these two are the worst! The best part though was when they had finally drank enough Eggnog and work them selves into a frenzy. At this point they jumped into one of those Bathtubs on tracks they call a snowcat and started it up. I was actually suprised at this since they have never actually accomplished that feat before! When it squeeked into life the suprise was evident on there faces as they looked at each other and were completely silent. Then all hell broke loose. You would have thought there was a Boy Band playing and all the girls in town were there in my back alley watching it. The giggles and cheers of joy could be heard for miles from those two. I thought Bob was going to passout as BigAl did but he quickly recovered and grabbed ahold of the controls. BigAl finally joined the land of the living but was still dazed and drunk from all the EggNog and the sheer rapture of being in an actually running Kristi. Bob not wanting to pass up on the once in a lifetime opportunatey of a actually running Kristi quickly worked the hydraulic levers and the Krist rose up on the trailer like the avenging angle herself comming for all the Snowtrac owners. I could see this in Bobs eyes. My wife actually looked at me and said. "Have you ever seen one of those things running"? "NO" I exclaimed just a bit to loud. Bob worked the controls like an old pro. The Kristi shacked and shuttered but stayed running. Feeling a bit more confident Bob slipped the lever into reverse while at the same time was slapping BigAls hands away from the controls. Im not sure but I could swear I heard BigAl say he was either Pooing or was the Pubah. Must be some Kristi prayer. But those two seemed a bit at odds at that point. As the Kristi started rolling towards the back of the trailer there excitment grew. Big Al was figgiding with his hands and jumping up and down in his seat. Bob was actually sweating from the sheer stress he was feeling. Was this the day? Was this the moment? He would end this Snow Trac fued. He would prove once and for all that there Snowcat, There idol, There reason for being was the true Snowcat. No others Snowcats would be put before theres. Theres was the only one. The trailer moaned as the weight transfered from the front to the back of the deck. As the tracks started down the ramp you could see that both men were proud. But I could also see that there eyes were watering. Were they crying? I also noticed that there was what looked like fog building up inside the cab. BigAl was trying to open the hatch thing and Bob wasnt looking to good. All of the color was draining from his face as it was also on BigAls. Bob passed out and hit his head on the controls as did BigAl. My wife cried out "Oh Dear!" "Somethings wrong!" As the Kristi rolled down the ramp and hit the snow it stopped. I ran over and tried to open the hatch but it just would not move. Finally after what seemed an eternity the latch gave way and a plume of exhaust erupted from the cabin of the Bath....Kristi. I yelled to my wife "Call 911! Call 911" I reached in and hesitated for just a moment. I knew turning off the ignition might just send these two over the edge of sanity. OK so there Kristi owners and Sanity has no realm with them but still. I knew doing so would utterly detroy them. So I quickly turned off the ignition. Maybe I thought these illegal gathering in my alley would finally stop. Maybe for once I can enjoy a Winters Soltice in peace. BigAl and Bob are once again safe. There both in a nice padded cell with a coloring book and crayons. They almost look happy.
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