-
Please be sure to read the rules and adhere to them. Some banned members have complained that they are not spammers. But they spammed us. Some even tried to redirect our members to other forums. Duh. Be smart. Read the rules and adhere to them and we will all get along just fine. Cheers. :beer: Link to the rules: https://www.forumsforums.com/threads/forum-rules-info.2974/
Most Ridiculous Reason You Broke Up
- Thread starter PGBC
- Start date
Ended a relationship on Christmas Eve, girlfriend I had been dating for a year was coming over on Christmas Eve to spend the night. She was running late, I called her and she told me she was running late and was stressed out about it, around 6pm. I called her back about a half hour later, to tell her not to stress about it and just come over when she is ready. When she answered the phone, she flipped out on me. ( I told you I was running late, I'm going to be there the whole f*&^ing weekend, what is your problem, etc. ) I couldn't get a word in anywhere. At that moment I realized that even though we had been dating for a year, I had no idea who she was or what she is capable of. When she finally slowed the ranting to a level that I could be herd, I told her that I felt I didn't know her as well as I thought I did and It was un acceptable behavior, and not to come over at all. Thats when she flipped out again. I hung up the phone with her still screaming. For a week after she called and left messages. But there was nothing to talk about.
When I tried to end it with a girlfriend, she demanded a reason. Knowing that she would be furious and beat on me if I told her the truth, I instead told her that I wasnt good enough, or smart enough for her.
Truthfully she was stupid, but very mean, and I was tired of her shit. But her massive ego was fed by my words, so I escaped her wrath.
Truthfully she was stupid, but very mean, and I was tired of her shit. But her massive ego was fed by my words, so I escaped her wrath.
Gary O'
Well-known member
Oh, that reminds me of a story
I write
so my stories are lengthy
sorry
scroll on if it looks too long
Patricia
My first real girlfriend, other than ‘dancer number three’ from the Jackie Gleason Show, was Patricia….fourth grade I think it was.
She had this smile, this beguiling smile, and if per chance she cast one your way, well, it turned all us guys into befuddled masses of profound stupidity, and I was no exception…and she knew it.
So every time she would come near, or I mysteriously found myself near her, I’d make sure and do something cool, like flip my fountain pen up in the air and nonchalantly catch it, writing side down.
Unknowing that I’d just sprayed myself with a unique pattern of Scheaffer traditional blue …..’Boob, James Boob’.
Oh, yeah, and her eyes…flashing, batting brown eyes….and some kinda smell too…better than, say, my catcher’s mitt, or even gramma’s rhubarb pie.
That’s all I remember about her looks.
Didn’t even consider the shape of her hind end, or if she even had one for that matter.
One blessed day her parents invited my parents to dinner.
I sat across the table from her, sipping my shaken not stirred fruit punch, creating a rather distinguished looking purple mustache.
These folks had lived outta the states for a few years, and rather proudly offered up their unusual cuisine.
There, on my plate, was a heaping festering mound of curry and rice. Not the spicy curry of the orient, no, this was some sorta green slimy slices of slug guts.
Patricia smiled at me, batting her eyes.
I forked the slug slices, and moved them around my plate, mustering and encouraging my life long taste buds of fried potatoes, hamburger patties and ketchup.
I furtively went to the potatoes.
Only they were swimming in some sorta gawd awful milk sauce….not fried, definitely not fried.
I think I had two bites, feigning nausea, gladly skipping dessert which looked much like mousse of dog vomit.
Patricia invited me up to her room (HER ROOM!!!), upstairs, legs of Patricia, leading the way….huh, Patricia has legs…nice, really really nice legs (fantasy log note 137; wimin my age have legs too. Take note, with etching fluids).
And there I was, in a gurl’s room.
Puffy, fuzzy things.
Pink things.
Lacy, frilly things.
Some sorta awning of posts and frilly cloth over her bed.
Pillows, stuffed toys, more pillows, more toys.
So there we were.
‘Nice place ya got here’ (I almost said ‘doll face’, but somehow knew my Bogart wasn’t working any better than my Bond).
‘You are in third place on my list.’
(‘what? there’s a list?’)
‘If you kiss my locket, you’ll be at the top.’
(‘If I kiss her locket?’)
(‘What the heck is a locket?’)
She pulled a dainty gold chain from where, I’d discover years later, cleavage came from.
Her locket was a little gold heart.
I felt really really stupid.
Here I was, in a gurl’s room, with all this claustrophobic crap, and even considering kissing her locket for cryin’ out loud.
Get me the heck outta here!
(bat, bat, smile)
S-o-o-o-o after I kissed her locket, landing me solidly into first place, we went downstairs.
Funny thing, next day at school I took on a much different persona.
My once pitter patting heart went back to a normal beat.
Her smile took on a more sneer like function.
Her batting eyes became nothing more than a possible tourette.
Her smell took on the odor of curry.
Basically, she disgusted me…and less than 24 hours ago I’d kissed her freaking locket!
My first fleeting relationship.
Not for locker room lore.
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
I had met a girl in the city before I moved here back in 2012. Things appeared to be going well so I put in for a posting in the city and moved here. We made plans to move in together. Shortly after moving in with her, the change happened and she became very controlling. I remember when I first moved in, we were still unpacking the moving trailer and she said "welcome to middle class". I guess owing 2 houses and having a full time job and 2 years of college since I was 18 made me low class because it wasn't in the city. Later on (only days), she was saying that I wouldn't be needing my boat and camper anymore as those were small town hick things and I was in the city now. And my son was being treated like a second class citizen next to her kids. I finally had enough after only being here for a couple weeks. My stuff wasn't even unpacked yet so after a blow up, I began moving everything back out and into a storage unit until I could get back on my feet again. She tried apologizing but showed her true colors.
FrancSevin
Proudly Deplorable
Gary O, that is some awesome prose. I cannot speak for the others, but I am sooooo glad you joined us.
Gary O'
Well-known member
Thank you, very much, Franc
I do a lot of writing, and toying with thoughts of starting a thread for my fractured prose
Most involve writing about average folks, of which turns out are not so average
FrancSevin
Proudly Deplorable
Your sense is common but,,,YOU AIN'T NO WAY AVERAGE!
Oldtimer661
Member
Had this girlfriend back in the 9th grade of school. All the guys chased her quite a bit all dreamed of being the guy who got to go out with her. She aske me one day at school if I would take her to the Sadie Hawkins Dance (Rare to be asked out by a popular girl) I accpeted. We had great fun went togther kind of steady for several months, one night at the drive in the back seat of my buddies car on a double date, she was telling us about some of them out drinking Boones Farm Strawberry Hill one Friday Nite.This guy she was drinking had a such small junk it made the "hair on her asshole look big!"It just flat turned me off! Never went around her any more! lol. Blew me away!
One is sort of funny and the other is sort of sad.
We had dated for a while off an on for several years. She came over and wanted to talk. She decided we should move in together. I am a nice guy and said we could try it. She moved in one day and it lasted two days. She played the thermostat like a piano. She would turn it up high because she was a little cool. Turning it up a little was not good enough. It had to be turned on as high as it would go. About time the sweat was running off me she would turn the thermostat down as low as it would go. It would go on like that all of the time. I was outside and came in to see the oven on high with her backed up to the open oven door trying to get warm with the thermostat turned down as low as it would get. I explained that the whole move in together thing is not working. Haven't seen or heard from her since.
The second one is the sad one. We had been living together for over seven years and go along with each other. She had two grown kids, a boy and a girl. Both had a child. The daughter decided that since I drank beer and would offer her brother one when he came over that I should buy her marijuana for her. I declined the offer. She didn't take it very well. That was a few days before Christmas. The daughter told her mother that she and her kid would not be over for Christmas dinner if I was there. Her mother was feeling bad about Christmas without them. Finally it was decided that I would leave the house so they could have a happy Christman dinner. I left early that morning and stayed away for the whole day. The more I thought about it the less I like it. I packed up and left. For some reason it seemed like thatr didn't fit into the Christman theme very well.
We had dated for a while off an on for several years. She came over and wanted to talk. She decided we should move in together. I am a nice guy and said we could try it. She moved in one day and it lasted two days. She played the thermostat like a piano. She would turn it up high because she was a little cool. Turning it up a little was not good enough. It had to be turned on as high as it would go. About time the sweat was running off me she would turn the thermostat down as low as it would go. It would go on like that all of the time. I was outside and came in to see the oven on high with her backed up to the open oven door trying to get warm with the thermostat turned down as low as it would get. I explained that the whole move in together thing is not working. Haven't seen or heard from her since.
The second one is the sad one. We had been living together for over seven years and go along with each other. She had two grown kids, a boy and a girl. Both had a child. The daughter decided that since I drank beer and would offer her brother one when he came over that I should buy her marijuana for her. I declined the offer. She didn't take it very well. That was a few days before Christmas. The daughter told her mother that she and her kid would not be over for Christmas dinner if I was there. Her mother was feeling bad about Christmas without them. Finally it was decided that I would leave the house so they could have a happy Christman dinner. I left early that morning and stayed away for the whole day. The more I thought about it the less I like it. I packed up and left. For some reason it seemed like thatr didn't fit into the Christman theme very well.
She was that hot, and you didn't hit it just once, in high school, shame on you.
Oldtimer661
Member
Looks was not every thing with me ever! But I suppose was with many it was. I had also herd later if you hit that its like a puppy you feed milk to for the first time and will not away....lol.