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Most embarrassing Sex story

not really a sex story exactly but....

my FIL,FIL's best friend,Mrs Bam and myself were in Livingstone LA trying out a new seafood place. we(mrs b and myself) had never tried oysters on the half...so we tried them... DW was eating and FIL told her to stop eating them and give me all the rest. He said "he should eat them, it'll put some lead in his pencil...":blush:

waitress came by and he told her.."better give him another order of oysters, he is going to need lots of lead in his pencil tonight...":blush:

needless to say, i didnt want any "lead in my pencil" that night...:ermm:
because we were all staying in the same damn hotel room
 
Back in '76 was in Copenhagen taking a summer course a group of us decided to tour some of Europe and one of our stops was Hamburg, Germany. After we checked into a Hotel we needed to exchange some money (to go Drinking) and on the way to the bank one of the guys was approach by what we thought was a "hot" woman looking for a bar. We had no idea where this bar was but the guy this girl was all over had to find it after we got some local currency. Man he was cleaning the sidewalk with his tongue hanging out on the way to the bank and then the bar!

Well we found the bar! And it was gay! Our friend who was a Tom Selleck look-alike didn't live it down for the rest of the trip! Lucky for him he found out before they went to bed! He would have gotten MORE then he ask for!
 
How about the guy who was caught jerking off?

That's happened to every guy in sports camp / army training at some point of time. The lesson? LOCK THE DAMN DOOR!!!
 
Ok I have another embarrassing story.....

A long long time ago, in a land far far away, there lived a 19 year old groomerdude. Well, one night as he lay fast asleep in bed, he was gently awoken to a glorious handjob from his girlfriend at the time. She was a cute little thing and liked to do things like that.

This particular night though, things felt a little different. They felt really good. She was using a new kind of lube. It felt awesome as she rubbed the whole area(without getting too descriptive, you get the picture). About a minute later, things started to burn. Mr. Groomerdude finally came out of his deep sleep and opened his eyes to discover that the new lube she was using was none other than.......









rub-a535-ice_1224168012_LRG.jpg


That poor groomerdude walked around like he was riding a bull for a few days to let the burning pain settle down.

If you have ever used A535, you know that it burns cold to ease the pain. Well, you can just imagine the burning sensation it would leave in that general area.
 
Not really a sex story,but kind of funny.

Back when I was married.My MIL and me were hanging new curtains.Wife was on bed rest.I was wearing my gym shorts,a Tshirt,and hanging low.I was standing in a chair putting up the curtain rods.I was holding the bracket and ask MIL to hold the curtain rod.She wasn't paying attention and grabbed my tiny and said well let go of it.I told her I couldn't, it was mine,but I would share.She looked up and turned bright red.

We divorced because of the reason she was on bed rest.The child she had was from south of the boarder.

Ok this is an embarrassing sex story.

When I was young.I mean high school age young.I started dating one of the more experienced girls.She had been teasing me and talking crap to me all day.That evening when we met up for our "DATE",she ask if we could go back to my house,where there was no one home.OK I said.I had been carrying a loaded weapon all day and I was ready to fire it off.We get back to my house and things started to get hot fast.She dropped my pants,knelt down,and grabbed my weapon.It went off,and shot her right in the forehead.She looked up, laughed, and ask how long it would take to reload.
 
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