# FUNNY PICTURE THREAD II



## Melensdad

To make the administration of the files on the forums easier we are breaking apart some of the really long threads.  Please post your FUNNY PHOTOS to this new thread.  The old thread has been locked.


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## Doc

Thanks Bob!!!


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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## FrancSevin

We have nothing like that down here in Missouri. Where can I catch that species?  What kind of bait?


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## Doc




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Doc

Uhh no thank you!!!!!   Only CA would come up with this idea, and they had to try it I suppose.


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## EastTexFrank

Doc said:


> Uhh no thank you!!!!!   Only CA would come up with this idea, and they had to try it I suppose.
> 
> View attachment 133612


That should work very well in California.  It's full of dicks.


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## loboloco

Melensdad said:


> To make the administration of the files on the forums easier we are breaking apart some of the really long threads.  Please post your FUNNY PHOTOS to this new thread.  The old thread has been locked.View attachment 133388


That's one heck of a place to hide the peanuts.


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## m1west

EastTexFrank said:


> That should work very well in California.  It's full of dicks.


in Texas its steers and queers.


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## FrancSevin

Proving without any doubt, the sexes are not,  and will never be,  EQUAL!


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## Doc




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## pirate_girl

??


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## pirate_girl




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## Pontoon Princess




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## EastTexFrank

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 133852



I'll have you know that I am in my early 70s and  I have two of those caps.  I've expanded my horizons to every brewery in the State and I'm still working on it.  I don't know if I'll make it before I die but I'm working on it as best I can.


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## Doc

I'd say it's more like 100%


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## Pontoon Princess




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## pirate_girl




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## Pontoon Princess




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## Melensdad

?


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## FrancSevin

Doc said:


> I'd say it's more like 100%
> 
> View attachment 133866


What donut????


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## pirate_girl

Pontoon Princess said:


> View attachment 133895


An apple a day keeps the doctor away?
? lol


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## pirate_girl

Hey, when the red light shows, hold your horses.

?


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## Lenny

Doc said:


> I'd say it's more like 100%
> 
> View attachment 133866


That means only 0.01% of men are gay


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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## FrancSevin

Doc said:


> I'd say it's more like 100%
> 
> View attachment 133866










I would suggest at least 99.9% of women see the mouse first off.


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## NorthernRedneck

What donuts?


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## Lenny

99.9% of the men won't see the whatever.  The other 00.1 must be gay.   That's a lot less that the percentage they claim to be gay.


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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## EastTexFrank

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 134086



I think that he knew before that.  He was a horny old bugger.


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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## EastTexFrank

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 134167



I love it.  It's not so long ago that that was where the motorway ended too.  You drove on motorway north out of England, hit the Scottish border and it turned in to a dual carriageway.  It's not easy growing up as a second class citizen.


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## Pontoon Princess




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## Pontoon Princess




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc

Where's Bernie?   LOL


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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## Pontoon Princess




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Lenny

Doc said:


> View attachment 134693


And women will remember what the players did last year, the year before, etc.


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## Doc

I like KC, the city so I was for the Chiefs last night.   
A friend sent this to me.  I had to laugh.


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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck

So you can fry an egg on the sidewalk down south. That's cute. But can you do this?


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## EastTexFrank

NorthernRedneck said:


> So you can fry an egg on the sidewalk down south. That's cute. But can you do this?
> 
> 
> 
> View attachment 134796



Nope and if I ever found myself somewhere that I could, I'd leave.


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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc




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## NorthernRedneck

Doc said:


> View attachment 134855


Lmao. I'm glued.


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## Lenny

Doc said:


> View attachment 134855


Does it taste like Tide Pods?  LOL


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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl

This goes for Ohio and Michigan too.
?


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## NorthernRedneck




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## Lenny

NorthernRedneck said:


> View attachment 134958


Yup.  20 below zero here right now.


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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck

Canadian kids getting bored of lockdown. 9


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## NorthernRedneck




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## XeVfTEUtaAqJHTqq




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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## FrancSevin




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck

FrancSevin said:


>


Lmao. Reminded me of my last f150. Check engine light was always on due to a cracked manifold. I changed it twice but those 5.4l engines were terrible for manifolds. Eventually I just put a piece of electrical tape over the check engine light and told everyone I had a custom loud exhaust system.


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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck

I have no words....wait a minute....nope...got nothing....


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## pirate_girl




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## FrancSevin




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## pirate_girl




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## Melensdad

At some point in time, somebody thought this was a good idea.

I don't know why.


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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## FrancSevin

What are you doing up so early?


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## pirate_girl

FrancSevin said:


> What are you doing up so early?


What are YOU doing up so early??
???


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## pirate_girl

??


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## Doc




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## Doc




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## Ceee

Doc said:


> View attachment 135702


OMG, that hair


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## FrancSevin

Doc said:


> View attachment 135703


When I was in the Corporate world, I had to play golf.  I hated the game.

I came from poverty and always got every ounce of value out of anything for which I had paid. I never understood  taking as few shots as possible for an expensive walk around the park, as a worthwhile endeavor.

I learned, in that same said Corporate world, to target the most profit for the least costs.  Yet here we all were blowing money literally to the wind.  Between the cost of equipment, balls lost in the woods, and green fees, I couldn't relate to it's productive value. We could have been back at the office generating revenues.

These guys would brag about how they wasted every fairway with as few shots as possible. I always went for 10 strokes and got my money's worth.

Never understood that game.


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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## Lenny

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 135872


SMART ASS!!!  LOL


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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl

?


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## pirate_girl

Lol


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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc

On today's episode of unsolved mysteries . . .


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## Lenny

Doc said:


> On today's episode of unsolved mysteries . . .
> 
> View attachment 136145


I'll betcha it voted for Biden!


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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## FrancSevin

NorthernRedneck said:


> View attachment 136285


Brian, I must say, " I like how you think!!!"


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## pirate_girl

?


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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## FrancSevin

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 136660


Lollie,  What are you planning to do with TWO men?  Isn't one trouble enough?

Being somewhat self evident, I have no comment about the trumpet.  LOL

Or the chainsaw.


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## pirate_girl

Well, this lol


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## Melensdad




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl

This is for Lenny.
?
By the way, you get out of jail when???


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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl

?


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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl

Lol


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## Lenny

Doc said:


> View attachment 136888


Los Angeles was that way back in the 1970s and 1980s when I lived near there.


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## m1west

Lenny said:


> Los Angeles was that way back in the 1970s and 1980s when I lived near there.


Hollywood too.


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## Doc

Lenny said:


> Los Angeles was that way back in the 1970s and 1980s when I lived near there.


I've never lived in LA but in the 90's I was there most every year.   I enjoyed it.   Fun place to visit.  Sure, I saw some tents at Santa Monica an thought If I was ever homeless this would be the place to live.   LOL   But tents were not near as predominant as they are now.  I was there in 2018 and it was so sad to see how trashy and how far the place had gone down hill.  Slum areas everywhere.   After my last visit I never ever see the need to return there again.


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## pirate_girl




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## m1west

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 136908


Found On The Road Dead


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## Ceee




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## waybomb

For melansdad:


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## pirate_girl

?


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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## EastTexFrank

Good volume, pressure and distance too.  The boy has potential.


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## NorthernRedneck

Snap-on has a tool for everything.


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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl

I like my weatherman's socks.
?


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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## CrakHoBarbie

Today on Mars....


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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## CrakHoBarbie

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 137201


Ewww... Come on now....


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## pirate_girl

CrakHoBarbie said:


> Ewww... Come on now....


I follow the very strange people on Facebook Lol


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## Doc




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## Melensdad




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## CrakHoBarbie

Doc said:


> View attachment 137204



This quote from a Facebook post traces back to a joke posted on Reddit in 2018, when Donald was POTUS.

That thread, posted in the r/Jokes subreddit on June 10 2018, reads: “In breaking news, Triple Crown winner Justify has turned down an invitation to White House. When asked why he answered, ‘If I wanted to see a horse’s ass, I would have finished second.’”


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## NorthernRedneck




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## Melensdad




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## pirate_girl




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## Melensdad




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl

Lol


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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Melensdad




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## Melensdad




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl

?


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## pirate_girl

?


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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## Melensdad




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## Melensdad




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## pirate_girl

?


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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## m1west

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 137666


Is it still available? ill go $320,000.00


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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl

?


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## Doc




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## FrancSevin

At least this guy was honest about it and, also, a gentleman.  After all, when finished, he obviously put the seat down.


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## Doc




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## pirate_girl

Fries? ??


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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## Colt Gomez

Every single time:


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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Doc

Too freaking funny!!!!     LMAO


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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## Melensdad




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## pirate_girl

?❤?


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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc

LMBO


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## Doc




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## pirate_girl

?


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## Doc




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## pirate_girl

Subtle advertising?
Lol


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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Melensdad




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## FrancSevin

Oh Lollie you are so bad.


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## Ceee




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## pirate_girl




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## olivia24

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 139005


Lol


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## Doc




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## olivia24

Conservative women are so much better!!


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## pirate_girl




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## olivia24

I needed that before work, lol


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## pirate_girl




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## olivia24

She  looks a  bit  mean, lol


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## Melensdad




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## pirate_girl




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## Melensdad




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc




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## FrancSevin

Doc said:


> View attachment 139143


Yes! An ironically by the same government that now tells us those drugs we were supposed to shun, are now perfectly legal so long as taxes are collected.

We are supposed to trust these people?????


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## Melensdad




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## pirate_girl

Just kidding! ?


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## Doc




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## pirate_girl

??


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## olivia24

Doc said:


> View attachment 139200


lol


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## olivia24

pirate_girl said:


> ??
> 
> View attachment 139225


It sure  looks good.


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## pirate_girl

Lol


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## Melensdad




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## MNwr786




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## pirate_girl

Ummm ... ok?? .. ?


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## Doc




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## Melensdad




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## pirate_girl




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## FrancSevin

Pinterest.com 
Some Headstone


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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl

Ugh...?


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## Doc




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## Pontoon Princess

they look more like twins and they own a shop in Seattle not Portland, too clean for Portland 


Doc said:


> View attachment 139413


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## FrancSevin

Doc said:


> View attachment 139413


Which one is Mickey Rourke?


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## Doc

FrancSevin said:


> Which one is Mickey Rourke?


Wife thinks right, I think left ...so we don't know.  Take your best guess.


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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## Pontoon Princess




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## EastTexFrank

Pontoon Princess said:


> View attachment 139500



a la orange.


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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl

?


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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl

?


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## pirate_girl

?


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## Doc




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## Melensdad




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## pirate_girl




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## Melensdad




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## pirate_girl




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## FrancSevin

JUST IN TIME FOR HALLOWEEN


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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 140318


I can relate!


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Doc




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels

I couldn't pass this one up!


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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## NorthernRedneck




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Melensdad




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## NorthernRedneck

Ever get that "deer in the headlights" look?


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## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Lenny

NorthernRedneck said:


> View attachment 140612


SEX therapy, right?


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## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## FrancSevin

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 140599


I'll take the forty acres but I want a woman too. 

I have 80 acres that looks a lot like the image. The house arrives in just a few weeks now.

Got the woman too.


....... so I'm set.

Oh wait, I need money for ammo and beer.

Workin' on it.


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## FrancSevin




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## pirate_girl

Lol


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## NorthernRedneck




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## PGBC

NorthernRedneck said:


> View attachment 140804




I wouldn't last 2 minutes.


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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck

For every problem, there's a solution.


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## pirate_girl




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## Lenny

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 140993


I have a t-shirt with that on it.


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## Pontoon Princess

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 140995


mmmmm easy to draw that conclusion, till you drive both.....


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## FrancSevin

Pontoon Princess said:


> mmmmm easy to draw that conclusion, till you drive both.....


Yeah, I would say the same about the Jaguar XKE V/12  automatic vrs the I-6 with a stick.

Same thing.  THE V/12 was smooth on the Interstate, but a pig in the twisties. The I-6 was a lot more agile and fun.

Many V/12's were such maintenance nightmares they got Chevy trans-plants.


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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc




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## john-in-ga




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## Ironman




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## pirate_girl




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## Doc




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## Pontoon Princess




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## Pontoon Princess

day late, but.......


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## J.J. McDaniels

I couldn't pass this one up.


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Doc

If you watch Yellowstone you'll get it.


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## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Ironman




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## Ironman




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## pirate_girl




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## FrancSevin

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 141246


Yeah that works.  ....... until she starts talking to another guy.


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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## NorthernRedneck

Something to consider...


----------



## Doc




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Ironman




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## Doc




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## Ironman




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## m1west

Ironman said:


> View attachment 141422


zombie fish


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## Ironman




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## Ironman




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## Doc




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## Mark1911




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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck

__


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## pirate_girl




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## Doc

LOL  


pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 141687



  LOL  "Better Call Saul"

==================================


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## Ironman




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl

... that would do it Lol


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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## Mark1911

Perhaps the coolest pie decoration ever…


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## NorthernRedneck

Personally, I don't care for turkey anymore as I can't seem to digest it.


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## Ironman




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## Ironman




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## Mark1911

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 141826


“That’s the gift that keeps on givin‘ the whole year Clark…” ~ Uncle Eddie


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Dmorency




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## Mark1911




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## Doc




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## Doc

What a year.  Tree is up.


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## pirate_girl




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## Ironman




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## pirate_girl

Ironman said:


> View attachment 142045


Just read about him getting tossed from CNN. Poor thing lol


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## Ironman

pirate_girl said:


> Just read about him getting tossed from CNN. Poor thing lol


Their only star and that network is in the shitter anyway


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## Mark1911

Ironman said:


> View attachment 142045


Poor Fredo….


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## mla2ofus

Celebrities, like politicians, eventually get it in their head they're invincible and above the law!!


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Ironman




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## NorthernRedneck




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




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## NorthernRedneck




----------



## Doc




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## mla2ofus

And like a bag of chips, I'll bet it has plenty of airspace


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## Doc




----------



## Doc




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## Ironman




----------



## Doc




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## Doc




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## echo

This won't get you any.


----------



## Doc




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## NorthernRedneck




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Mark1911




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## FrancSevin

NorthernRedneck said:


> View attachment 142330


I used to love Bush Bavarian beer.  But then came Inbev.
Still love the bush..
but,,,
Don't like the beer


----------



## Dmorency




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## mla2ofus

It's a CYA.


----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Ironman




----------



## john-in-ga




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## john-in-ga




----------



## john-in-ga




----------



## Ironman




----------



## mla2ofus

And he got a beautiful tan too.


----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## echo

I think my present is still on a ship in kaliforney.

Maybe that is what I get for buying myself a present.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc

Never ever happen but made me laugh.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman

.


----------



## Gatorboy




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## XeVfTEUtaAqJHTqq




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## john-in-ga

Cat in sak


----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## mla2ofus

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 142815


  Wonder what homeowner's insurance would cost for that??


----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## pirate_girl

Unbelievable


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## NorthernRedneck

I'm feeling like this today.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman

It’s that time of the year again to take the tree down 

.


----------



## Ironman




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## john-in-ga

NorthernRedneck said:


> View attachment 142968


 
Y'all this southerner ain't driving on no snow unless absolutely necessary.  If I just got to go somewheres with snow on the road, I most certainly ain't gonna take Grandma along unless she needs emergency medical care at the hospital.  In which case she would leave the vittles on the porch.
As far as hauling lady folks carrying vittles, I got training for that long ago and my wife gives me a refresher course on a regular bases, even though, we rarely have snow.  But with all that training, as a general rule - snow on the road - I stay on the porch or, better yet, inside by the fire.


----------



## Ironman




----------



## Lenny

Ironman said:


> View attachment 142970


Makes sense.  Where is the beer fridge?


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## mla2ofus

Ironman said:


> View attachment 142970


Seen bathrooms like that in small RVs.


----------



## Melensdad




----------



## FrancSevin

mla2ofus said:


> Seen bathrooms like that in small RVs.


Or sailboats.


----------



## Ironman




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl

Diaphoretic!


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## NorthernRedneck

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 142992



At least they also included the "wet labor" day part in there.


----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl

Ummm .. yes?
Lol


----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Doc




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Ironman

Palindrome? Is that what you college educated folks call it ?
So I captured this today  

.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## NorthernRedneck

This one's for PG.


----------



## pirate_girl

NorthernRedneck said:


> This one's for PG.
> 
> 
> View attachment 143255


Brian, once when three of us (friends and I - all nurses) were eating at a thai restaurant the subject of a residents pressure ulcer came up.
There we were, discussing it freely with two younger people sitting at a table close by. The looks on their faces.
Lol
I did apologize.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## john-in-ga




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## mla2ofus

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 143450


  A redneck bidet!!


----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels

mla2ofus said:


> A redneck bidet!!


It'd certainly helped during the Toilet Paper Crisis


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## EastTexFrank

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 143585


Ahhhhh!!!!  That's not nice.


----------



## Doc




----------



## NorthernRedneck

In light of the 12" snowfall we received yesterday....


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## Ironman




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## bczoom

Similar to that plow truck that buckled over it's plow, we got a decent snow storm last Monday.  A plow truck was clearing a road and hit one of those heavy steel plates they use to cover pits in the road that are under construction. The plow slid the plate then the plow truck fell in the pretty deep hole.  Took awhile to get it out.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## FrancSevin

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 143795


I think it would be helpful if our teacher's union and universities agreed to return to Reading, Writing and,  Arematik; Areh; Aretha;  Math, instead of social justice racism.


----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## NorthernRedneck

Our dogs this week at -35.


----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Doc




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl

Doc said:


> View attachment 143949


If I had a dime for every one of those I've emptied in the last 40 years, I'd be a millionaire.


----------



## EastTexFrank

pirate_girl said:


> If I had a dime for every one of those I've emptied in the last 40 years, I'd be a millionaire.



You hold it, I'll fill it.  Hold it closer, I don't have the range that I once did.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## pirate_girl

Gee everyone's getting in on the act!


----------



## Ironman




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels

LMFAO


----------



## Ironman

.


----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## FrancSevin

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 143942










Nonsense!
When it happens everybody, male and female, stifles but cannot contain their laughter


----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

There's not one but 2 things wrong with this pic.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## john-in-ga

This has got to make for a really cool ride at top speed.


----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

This video will really make you laugh.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

Gofundme has been cancelling the Canada truckers account.

**


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 144640


Remember when a 7 cent coupon was an incentive to buy something?

Betcha' don't.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## lorenzo

bczoom said:


> View attachment 144751


And he looks sooooooo happy.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ross 650

bczoom said:


> View attachment 144788


 Man, I have sat with these coots and swapped advice.  I believe this is in Columbus, Tx.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Lenny

bczoom said:


> View attachment 144828)


Every sign outside of Sioux City Iowa was shot up when I was growing up there.   Of course I didn't shoot any.   <GRIN>


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## Lenny

Doc said:


> View attachment 144894


You're just NORMAL!


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Gary O'

That one reminded me of wunna mine;


----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## mla2ofus

bczoom said:


> View attachment 144910


  Aned probably some blood spilled!!


----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels

mla2ofus said:


> Aned probably some blood spilled!!


Skin grafts, emergency surgery, maybe a visit from the men in white coats......


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom

It's a little old but still funny.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## pirate_girl

What a car!


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin

pirate_girl said:


> What a car!
> 
> View attachment 145021


I actually owned one of them.

As a teen no less.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## echo

He,He,he


----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## pirate_girl

Super Bowl memes...


----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## Ironman




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc

For the ladies:


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom

THINGS I LEARNED LIVING IN THE SOUTH
1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.
2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.
3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South, plus a couple no one's seen before.
4. If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.
5. Onced and Twiced are words.
6. It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy!
7. Jawl-P? means: Did you all go to the bathroom?
8. People actually grow, eat and like okra.
9. Fixinto is one word. It means I'm going to do something.
10. There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there's supper.
11. Iced tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're two. We do like a little tea with our sugar. It is referred to as the Wine of the South.
12. Backwards and forwards means I know everything about you.
13. The word jeet is actually a question meaning, 'Did you eat?'
14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is, you work until you're done or it's too dark to see.
15. You don't PUSH buttons, you MASH em.
16. Y'all is singular. All Y'all is plural.
17. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect, or animal.
18. You carry jumper cables in your car for your OWN car.
19. You only own five spices: salt, pepper, mustard, Tabasco and ketchup.
20. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local high school sports, the motor sports, and gossip.
21. Everyone you meet is a Honey, Sugar, Miss (first name) or Mr (first name)
22. You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
23. You know what a hissy fit is..
24. Fried catfish is the other white meat.
25. We don't need no dang Driver's Ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive!!!
26. You understand these jokes and forward them to your Southern friends and those who just wish they were from the SOUTH.
AND one more:
27. Why did the chicken cross the road? To show that stupid possum that it CAN be done!


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## Ironman




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## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## m1west

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 145358


How did you get a picture of my dog?


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom

Check your clocks in 30 minutes from now.
It'll be 2:22:22 2/22/22


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## Doc

LOL  He looks like Roger Daltrey


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## FrancSevin




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## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 145785


It is a manual gearshift.

... like all things should be and were in the golden past.


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## mla2ofus

I  would love to watch a youngster today trying to shift/drive a 3 on the tree w/ overdrive. Once above 30 mph you have lift up on the accelerator to shift into O/D and you also have to press the accelerator all the way down above 30 mph to get passing gear. Especially on city streets where, if you don't pull the tee handle to lock out the O/D you have no engine braking below 30 mph.


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## pirate_girl




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## Lenny

bczoom said:


> View attachment 145877


I said SOUL food.


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## mla2ofus

Lenny said:


> I said SOUL food.


   Maybe filet of sole!!


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Ikea!


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## Doc




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## Ironman




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## FrancSevin

Doc said:


> View attachment 146312


I betting they had a daughter or two!


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Ironman




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Ironman




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## bczoom

AN IRISHMAN’S FIRST DRINK WITH HIS SON
I was reading an article last night about fathers and sons, and memories came flooding back to the time I took my son out for his first drink.
Off we went to our local bar, which is only two blocks from the house.
I got him Guinness Stout. He didn’t like it so I drank it.
Then I got him an Old Style. He didn’t like it either, so I drank it.
It was the same with the Coors and the Bud.
By the time we got down to the Irish whiskey . . ..
I could hardly push the stroller back home.


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## bczoom

I was sitting at a long stoplight yesterday, minding my own business, patiently waiting for it to turn green even though there was no on-coming traffic.
A carload of scruffy-bearded, young men shouting Anti-American and BLM slogans with a half-burned American Flag duct-taped on the trunk of their car and a "Remember George Floyd" slogan spray painted on the side stopped next to me.Suddenly they yelled, "Defund the police." and took off before the light changed.
Out of nowhere an 18-wheeler came speeding through the intersection and ran directly over their car, crushing it completely and killing everyone in it.
For several minutes I sat in my car thinking to myself, "Man... that coulda been me!"
So this morning, bright and early, I went out and got myself a job as a truck driver.


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## NorthernRedneck




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Melensdad




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc




----------



## NorthernRedneck

This is perfect for us up here. 4ft of snow and rain all day yesterday. Talk about a sloppy mess on our roadway.


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## NorthernRedneck

__


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## Ironman




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Lenny




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## NorthernRedneck




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## bczoom




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## bczoom

*Aliens visit Earth. They come in peace and surprisingly , they speak English.

Obviously, all of the heads of government and religious leaders want to speak to the aliens so they set up a meeting with our new visitors. When it’s the Pope’s turn, he asks: “Do you know about our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ?”

“You mean JC?”, responds the alien. “Yeah, we know him! He’s the greatest, isn’t he? He swings by every year to make sure that we are doing ok”.

Surprised, the pope follows up with: “He visits every year?! It’s been over two millennia and we’re still waiting for his SECOND coming!”

The alien sees that the pope has become irate at this fact and starts trying to rationalize. “Maybe he likes our chocolate better than yours?”

The pope retorts “Chocolates? What are you talking about? What does that have to do with anything?”

The alien says “Yea, when he first visited our planet we gave him a huge box of chocolates! Why? What did you guys do?”*


----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom

A boat of 10 Mexicans is stopped off the coast of California:

Coast Guard: Stop! Where are you headed?
Mexican boat: To the shore of California.
Coast Guard: What business do you have with the state of California?
Mexican boat: We are heading to the state of California to reclaim the land taken from Mexico by the gringos. We will rage a sneak attack war worse than Pearl Harbor.
Coast Guard ship sea men are heard laughing for about 4 minutes: The 10 of you?.... (The laughter continues)...
Mexican boat: We are the last 10, the rest are already there.


----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Ironman




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## EastTexFrank

Ironman said:


> View attachment 147504



I built one somewhat like that at the farm.  Never had any more problems.


----------



## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## FrancSevin

NorthernRedneck said:


> View attachment 147512


If you ask me, I prefer women who never had a penis.

let that think for a moment.


----------



## FrancSevin




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## bczoom




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## Doc

FrancSevin said:


> If you ask me, I prefer women who never had a penis.
> 
> let that think for a moment.


Sounds like another way of saying 'Virgin'.      (but I do know what you were meaning Franc).


----------



## Ironman




----------



## FrancSevin

Doc said:


> Sounds like another way of saying 'Virgin'.      (but I do know what you were meaning Franc).


Good catch Doc.

 At 75 one would be impossible to find.  Lucky for me I found one 55 years ago.  Even back then it was rather rare.


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Doc




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## XeVfTEUtaAqJHTqq




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## FrancSevin

Now if only I could remember where I left them


----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## NorthernRedneck




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## FrancSevin




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Melensdad




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom

Every week day grandma would get on the van to the Senior Citizens Center. To show her appreciation she would hand the driver a zip lock bag of peanuts. The driver, at first appreciated them, but eventually grew tired of them. One day he told her that there was no need to be so generous. "Oh, that's ok", she replied, " They would just go waste. I don't have any teeth and can only suck the chocolate off of them."


----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom

Two men are sitting at a bar. One says to the other, "You look familiar ".

The second says. "You do too".

The first asks, "Were are you from?"

The second answers, "Akron"

The first responds, "Really, I am too!"

So, the second man asks, "Where did you go to school? "

The first responds " St Marys"

The second is dumbfounded, " That is amazing, I went there too! What street did you live on?

The first answers "Oak"

The second acknowledges he lived on the same street. The two are laughing ang hugging one another when a 3rd man walks in.

The third man asks the bartender how things are going.

The bartender responds, " It is going to be a long night. The Murphy twins are drunk again."


----------



## bczoom

While riding my Harley, I swerved to avoid hitting a deer, lost control and landed in a ditch, severely banging my head.
Dazed and confused I crawled out of the ditch to the edge of the road when a shiny new convertible pulled up with a very beautiful woman who asked, "Are you okay"?

As I looked up, I noticed she was wearing a low-cut blouse with cleavage to die for...

"I'm okay I think," I replied as I pulled myself up to the side of the car to get a closer look.

She said, "Get in and I'll take you home, so I can clean and bandage that nasty scrape on your head."

"That's nice of you," I answered, "but I don't think my wife will like me doing that!"

"Oh, come now, I'm a nurse," she insisted. "I need to see if you have any more scrapes and then treat them properly."

Well, she was really pretty and very persuasive. Being sort of shaken and weak, I agreed, but repeated, "I'm sure my wife won't like this."

We arrived at her place which was just few miles away and,after a couple of cold beers and the bandaging, I thanked her and said, "I feel a lot better, but I know my wife is going to be really upset so I'd better go now."

"Don't be silly!", she said with a smile. "Stay for a while. She won't know anything. By the way, where is she?"

"Still in the ditch, I guess."


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## FrancSevin




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## NorthernRedneck




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Lenny

MY WIFE SAID SHE'S GOING TO PAINT HER NAILS RED WHEN SHE GETS HOME.  SHE IS GOING TO BE SO HAPPY THAT I DID IT FOR HER!


----------



## Ironman




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## NorthernRedneck




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## bczoom




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## FrancSevin




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Melensdad




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## NorthernRedneck




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 147954


That was just mean.

Signed;
*Wichita Lineman*


----------



## bczoom




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## FrancSevin




----------



## NorthernRedneck




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## FrancSevin




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom

A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife, who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday was not far off, he asked what she'd like to have for her birthday.

'I'd like to be eight again', she replied, still looking in the mirror.

On the morning of her Birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl of Coco Pops, and then took her to Adventure World theme park. What a day! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of Fear, the Screaming Roller Coaster, everything there was.

Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. He then took her to a McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake.

Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and her favorite candy, M&M's. What a fabulous adventure!

Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed exhausted.

He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked, 'Well Dear, what was it like being eight again'?

Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed.

'I meant my dress size, you ****ing retard!!!!'

The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is gonna get it.....wrong.


----------



## bczoom

Back in 1785, John Adams was appointed as the first American ambassador to Great Britain. This was right after the revolutionary war.

One night at a party with the Prime Minister's residence they had a large banquet with dozens of people including Adams. Americans weren't very popular in England at that time.

After dinner Adams asked his host the prime minister where the privy was. He pointed to a small out building in the rear of the large house.

When Adams entered he noticed a large picture on the wall of George Washington, meant as an insult to Washington.

When Adams returned to the party, the prime minister asked Adam if he happened to notice the large portrait of Washington. Adams said yes I did. The prime minister asked him what he thought. Adams said he fully agreed with the portrait and found it to be very appropriate and offered other compliments.

The stunned prime minister seemed to be confused with Adams answer. He asked him if he found it insulting to George Washington and Adams said no not at all, I find it very efficient.

EFFICIENT said the prime minister, what do you mean?

Adams replied that it's been his experience that nothing will scare the shit out of an Englishmen quicker than the very sight of General George Washington.


----------



## bczoom

Two guys in their mid-twenties are sitting at a bar having a beer. One of the guys says to his buddy, “Man, you really look tired.”

His buddy says, “Dude, I'm exhausted. My girlfriend wants sex all the time, three, four, even six times a night, every night. She wakes me up at all hours. I just don't know what to do.”

A fellow about 65, sitting a couple of stools down overheard the conversation.

He looked over at the two young men and with the wisdom of years says... “Marry her. That'll put a stop to that nonsense.”


----------



## bczoom

30 seconds left on the microwave.
What Women do: Set table, pour drinks, tweet, talk on the phone.
What Men do: Do the NASA countdown.


----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## bczoom

I told my son, "You will marry the girl I choose." He said, "No."

So I told him, "She is Bill Gates' daughter." He said, "Ok."

Then I called Bill Gates, and said, "I want your daughter to marry my son." Bill Gates said, "No."

So I told Bill Gates, "My son is the CEO of the world bank." Bill Gates said, "Ok."

Then I called the president of world bank, and asked him to make my son the CEO. He said, "No."

So I told him, "My son is Bill Gates' son-in-law." He said, "OK."

Well, that's exactly how politics works...


----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Ironman




----------



## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 148029


See my personal story about this phenome here





__





						Air in Bags of snacks
					

This was posted today and it is funny. However, it brings back one of my biggest embarrassments in business.  I am a packaging engineer. My special niche is form fill and seal packaging. My company packaged coupons and toys for years that went into dog food, packaged meats, frozen foods and...




					www.forumsforums.com


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## mla2ofus

bczoom said:


> View attachment 148083


Best description of old age I've heard: "What don't hurt, don't work". If so there's a lot of me still working!!


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels

Tempting but likely effective -


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## pirate_girl

I'm nowhere near the devil, but I've been keeping up with the forum.
Mwaaahhaaa!


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

So, my son asked me what it meant to get "stoned". After a long thought out explanation, he looked even more confused. Then I saw he had been reading his bible.


----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom

ME: Boss, I need to go home. I have a "nice wee cough".
BOSS: You have a nice wee cough?
ME: Thank you.


----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

I was in the six item express lane at the store quietly fuming.
Completely ignoring the sign, the woman ahead of me had slipped into the check-out line pushing a cart piled high with groceries. Imagine my delight when the cashier beckoned the woman to come forward, looked into the cart, and asked sweetly, "So which six items would you like to buy?"

Wouldn't it be great if that happened more often?

----------------------------- - ------------------------------

Because they had no reservations at a busy restaurant, my elderly neighbor and his wife were told there would be a 45 minute wait for a table.
"Young man, we're both 90 years old," the husband said. "We may not have 45 minutes."
They were seated immediately.

------------------------------ ------------------------

The reason Politicians try so hard to get re-elected is that they would "hate" to have to make a living under the laws they have passed.


----------



## bczoom

All eyes were on the radiant bride as her father escorted her down the aisle. They reached the altar and the waiting groom. The bride kissed her father and placed something in his hand.
The guests in the front pews responded with ripples of laughter. Even the priest smiled broadly.
As her father gave her away in marriage, the bride gave him back his credit card.

------------------------------ ------------------------

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

------------------------------ -----------------------

Three friends from the local congregation were asked, "When you're in your casket, and friends and congregation members are mourning over you, what would you like them to say?"

Artie said, "I would like them to say I was a wonderful husband, a fine spiritual leader, and a great family man."

Eugene commented, "I would like them to say I was a wonderful teacher and servant of God who made a huge difference in people's lives.."

Al said, "I'd like them to say, 'Look, he's moving!'"


----------



## bczoom

Smith climbs to the top of Mt. Sinai to get close enough to talk to God.
Looking up, he asks the Lord. "God, what does a million years mean to you?"
The Lord replies, "A minute."
Smith asks, "And what does a million dollars mean to you?"
The Lord replies, "A penny."
Smith asks, "Can I have a penny?"
The Lord replies, "In a minute."

------------------------------ -------------------

A man goes to a shrink and says, "Doctor, my wife is unfaithful to me. Every evening, she goes to Larry's bar and picks up men. In fact, she sleeps with anybody who asks her! I'm going crazy. What do you think I should do?"
"Relax," says the Doctor, "take a deep breath and calm down. Now, tell me, exactly where is Larry's bar?"

------------------------------ -------------------

John was on his deathbed and gasped pitifully, "Give me one last request, dear," he said.
"Of course, John," his wife said softly.
"Six months after I die," John said, "I want you to marry Bob."
"But I thought you hated Bob," she said..
With his last breath John said, "I do!"
------------------------------ --------

A man goes to see the Rabbi. '
"Rabbi, something terrible is happening and I have to talk to you about it."
The Rabbi asked, "What's wrong?"
The man replied, "My wife is going to poison me."
The Rabbi, very surprised by this, asks, "How can that be?"
The man then pleads, "I'm telling you, I'm certain she's going to poison me. What should I do?"
The Rabbi then offers, "Tell you what. Let me talk to her, I'll see what I can find out and I'll let you know."
A week later the Rabbi calls the man and says, "I spoke to your wife on the phone for three hours. You want my advice?
The man said, "Yes" and the Rabbi replied, "Take the poison."


----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## NorthernRedneck

Since it's Easter this weekend.


----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## m1west

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 148322


This is what happens when you grow up poor in a rural area, we got to where the one that climbed the highest tree and your friends cut it down, you win. I only dislocated my shoulder twice.


----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl

I follow a couple of UK funny groups on Farcebook.
Saw this one today.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom

I hate it when I see an old person and then realize we went to high school together.

I used to be able to do cartwheels. Now I tip over putting on my underwear.

I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes... so she hugged me.

My wife says I only have 2 faults. I don't listen and something else....

At my funeral, take the bouquet off my coffin and throw it into the crowd to see who is next.

I thought growing old would take longer.

I came, I saw, I forgot what I was doing. Retraced my steps, got lost on the way back. Now I have no idea what's going on.

The officer said, "You drinking?" I said, "You buying?" We just laughed and laughed....I need bail money.

I think the reason we are born with two hands is so we can pet two dogs at once.

Day 12 without chocolate. Lost hearing in my left eye.

Scientists say the universe is made up of protons, neutrons and electrons. They forgot to mention morons.

The adult version of "head, shoulders, knees and toes" is "wallet, glasses, keys and phone."

A dog accepts you as the boss... a cat wants to see your resume.

Oops.... did I roll my eyes out loud?

Life is too short to waste time matching socks.

Wi-fi went down for five minutes, so I had to talk to my family. They seem like nice people.

If you see me talking to myself, just move along. I'm self-employed; we're having a staff meeting.

I won't be impressed with technology until I can download food.

Some people call me crazy. I prefer happy with a twist.

My doctor asked if anyone in my family suffers from mental illness. I said, "No, we all seem to enjoy it."

I really don't mind getting old, but my body is having a major fit.

Camping: where you spend a small fortune to live like a homeless person.

Project Manager...because Miracle Worker isn't an official job title.

I told my wife I wanted to be cremated. She made me an appointment for Tuesday.

Measure once, cuss twice..

My dream job would be driving the karma bus.

THINK! (It's not illegal.... YET)

I don't care who dies in a movie, as long as the dog lives.

The world's best antidepressant has 4 legs, a wagging tail and comes with unconditional love.

Love is how excited your dog gets when you come home.

I've reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me.

If you're happy and you know it, it's your meds.


----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom

Police have just confirmed that a man who tragically fell from the roof of an 18th floor night club was not a bouncer.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## mla2ofus

I just can't believe very many people really give a shyt about their marital problems!!


----------



## Melensdad




----------



## pirate_girl

mla2ofus said:


> I just can't believe very many people really give a shyt about their marital problems!!


I don't really.
But I think she put that man through a heck of a lot.
I do like him, her? Not so much.


----------



## Melensdad




----------



## bczoom

An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.

They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, 'Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building.'

The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, 'Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too.'

The blonde opened his lunch and said,' Bologna again! If I get a bologna sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too.'

The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage, and jumped to his death.

The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito, and jumped, too.

The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.

At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said, 'If I'd known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!'

The Mexican's wife also wept and said, 'I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn't realize he hated burritos so much.'

Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife. The blonde's wife said, 'Don't look at me. He made his own lunch.'


----------



## bczoom




----------



## Melensdad

Back in my day we practiced Darwinism in our yards


----------



## Ironman

@pirate_girl


----------



## pirate_girl

Ironman said:


> @pirate_girl
> 
> 
> View attachment 148603


Ahhh my David!!


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## john-in-ga




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Lenny

bczoom said:


> View attachment 148671


Is that Alice Kramden in one of those craters?  LOL


----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

A Pastor's wife was expecting a baby, so he stood before the congregation and asked for a raise. After much discussion, they passed a rule that whenever the preacher's family expanded, so would his paycheck.

After 6 children, this started to get expensive and the congregation decided to hold another meeting to discuss the preacher's expanding salary. A great deal of yelling and inner bickering ensued, as to how much the clergyman's additional children were costing the church, and how much more it could potentially cost.

After listening to them for about an hour, the pastor rose from his chair and spoke, 'Children are a gift from God, and we will take as many gifts as He gives us.'

Silence fell on the congregation. In the back pew, a little old lady struggled to stand, and finally said in her frail voice, 'Rain is also a gift from God, but when we get too much of it, we wear rubbers.'

The entire congregation said, 'Amen.'


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Lenny

I'm going to buy a bunch of these and offer to put them on cars for about $300.  I will call it a CADILLAC CONVERTER


----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Umberto

bczoom said:


> View attachment 148758


I would love me a box of Tim Bits.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Umberto




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## pirate_girl

Here's me in 30 years...


----------



## Umberto

pirate_girl said:


> Here's me in 30 years...
> 
> 
> View attachment 149092


No kidding. An elderly lady was robbed at an ATM in Olympia recently. Im sure it happens all over.


----------



## NorthernRedneck

One lucky nut.


----------



## Umberto




----------



## Mr Bell

Umberto said:


> View attachment 149095


WOW, look at the hearts on her!


----------



## FrancSevin

Nothing wrong with that advice.


Francly,  I can't stop looking at her heart.
(Misspelling is intentional.)

It's right there between 'dem thar hills right?


----------



## Melensdad




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Umberto




----------



## J.J. McDaniels

Sorry peeps, I couldn't resist.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels

Umberto said:


> View attachment 149126


And that is one thing I don't think I'll ever be able to unsee.


----------



## Umberto

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> And that is one thing I don't think I'll ever be able to unsee.


And back at you…


----------



## J.J. McDaniels

There's more. Today, I'm bored and more subject to childish humor.


----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Umberto




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## carebears

bczoom said:


> View attachment 149247


this kinda sad


----------



## Ironman




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Lenny

bczoom said:


> View attachment 149337


Now I'm a boxer


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Doc




----------



## Umberto




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

*RESURRECTION*
The minister started his Children's Sermon with a question, "Who knows what a Resurrection is?”
Without missing a beat, a young boy says, "If you have one lasting more than 4 hours, call your physician.”

*REALITY*
One day the first-grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, "... and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, "The sky is falling, the sky is falling!”
The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that farmer said?”
One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: ‘Holy crap! A talking chicken!'"


----------



## bczoom




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## FrancSevin

Our Crossfire car club goes on a river float trip every year near Steelville MO.  Last year we tried a different river and enjoyed the peaceful quiet woodland scenes with these folks.







This year we plan to try a different river.


----------



## bczoom

Those don't look like Crossfires to me...


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> Those don't look like Crossfires to me...


We have found that our Crossfires don't perform well in water.  

I was in a canoe that day carrying all the beer and food.  Everyone else was in a river kayak.

Imagine trying to paddle a canoe loaded with cold beer and food thru that crowd.

I did get a lot of this though


----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Lenny




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## NorthernRedneck

bczoom said:


> View attachment 149796



I can relate. I arrived at camp and discovered that my coffee maker didn't survive the winter. Still runs but burst pipe inside so it leaks all over the floor


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Lenny




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## chowderman

reminds me . . .


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## pirate_girl

Gas prices so high now, people are driving pallet jacks.


----------



## pirate_girl

I specifically saved this for EastTexFrank, my favourite Scottie.❤


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## chowderman

I just saw a blurb that youngsters can't figure out what the little triangle left/right next to the gas pump indicator means.
in the follow-on, they showed a battery with + and - ends with an arrows to indicate the charging side.
we're not going to have to worry about the new generation, they will die of stupidity.

someone pointed out, EV with a centerline hood/trunk charging point have an arrow/triangle pointing 'up.'
so next time you see a neo-child crawling around on the roof of the car looking for someplace to plug it in,
you'll know.


----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

For PG!


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 150171


Go ahead bitch,,,;TRY!


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

Another for PG


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels

bczoom said:


> View attachment 150220


And it's totally morbid if ya think about it.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels

Savage.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels

Saw this on another forum. Def thought it was worth posting here.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## EastTexFrank

bczoom said:


> View attachment 150254



 That deserves a rimshot!!!!


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels

LMAO -


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

PUNS FOR YOUR ENJOYMENT.

The World Health Organization has announced that dogs cannot contract Covid-19. Dogs previously held in quarantine can now be released. To be clear, WHO let the dogs out.

I saw an ad for burial plots, and thought to myself that's the last thing I need.

Intelligence is like underwear. It is important that you have it, but not necessary that you show it off.

Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?

A courtroom artist was arrested today for an unknown reason, details are sketchy.

People are making end of the world jokes like there's no tomorrow.

Whatever you do, always give 100% unless you're donating blood.

What do you call a sleepwalking nun? Roamin’ Catholic.

What did Snow White say when she came out of the photo booth? Someday my prints will come.

A girl said she recognized me from her vegetarian club but I’d never met herbivore.

Q: Dad, are we pyromaniacs?

A: Yes, we arson.

I've always had an irrational fear of speed bumps but I'm slowly getting over it.

What word becomes shorter when you add two letters to it? Short.

If you're not supposed to eat at night, why is there a light bulb in the refrigerator?

Don't let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started out as a basket case.

There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.

No pun in ten did.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

1. There are two sides to every divorce: Yours and Shithead's.
2. The closest I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content.
3. I live in my own little world but it's OK; everyone knows me here.
4. I saw a rather large woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess" on it.
I said, "Thyroid problem?"
5. I don't do drugs 'cause I find I get the same effect just by
standing up really fast.
6. A sign In a Chinese Pet Store: "Buy one dog, get one flea."
7. Money can't buy happiness but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
8. I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner.
9. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the "terminal"?
10. I don't approve of political jokes. I've seen too many of them get elected.
11. The most precious thing we have is life, yet it has absolutely no trade-in value.
12. If life deals you lemons, make lemonade. If life deals you
tomatoes, make Bloody Marys.
13. I love being married. It's so great to find that one special
person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
14. Shopping tip: You can get shoes for a buck at bowling alleys.
15. I am a nobody; nobody is perfect, and therefore I am perfect.
16. Every day I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive.
17. That Claudia Schiffer must be a genius because I told a friend my plan to attain world peace, and he told me I have "Schiffer Brains."
18. No one ever says, "It's only a game!" when their team is winning.
19. Ever notice that people who spend money on beer, cigarettes and lottery tickets are always complaining about being broke and not feeling well?
20. How long a minute is, depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.
21. Isn't having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a
peeing section in a swimming pool?
22. Marriage changes passion .. . . suddenly you're in bed with a relative.
23. Why is it that most nudists are people you don't want to see naked?
24. Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled.
25. Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words:
Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been!
26. Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.


----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Ironman




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## pirate_girl




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Ironman




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Doc




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## bczoom




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## pirate_girl




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Melensdad




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## Ironman




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## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Melensdad




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## Dmorency




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## Ironman




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## bczoom




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## NorthernRedneck




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## bczoom




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## bczoom

This is a shot of Jeremy Clarkson in one of his shows.


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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## NorthernRedneck

There's truth to that. We have a nice deck and back yard we can barely use now for fear of being carried away by a mosquito.


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 150775


Story of my life.

I'm allergic to cats.

We have five of them.

I'm told, in a few months, five more are coming.

Pray for me.


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## bczoom

I too am allergic to cats but we got one this spring as well.  It's not allowed in my house!


----------



## m1west

Cats are handy little bastards, out here in ruraldom, the have 3 and the neighbor doesn't, we met at the fence last week and he showed me pictures of a couple rattle snakes he recently killed around his yard, warning me to watch out.
When I first moved here we had no cats and I killed a couple each year. Got the 3 cats and no more snakes for the last 13 years. The rodent population is also decimated.


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## FrancSevin

m1west said:


> Cats are handy little bastards, out here in ruraldom, the have 3 and the neighbor doesn't, we met at the fence last week and he showed me pictures of a couple rattle snakes he recently killed around his yard, warning me to watch out.
> When I first moved here we had no cats and I killed a couple each year. Got the 3 cats and no more snakes for the last 13 years. The rodent population is also decimated.


I know all that.  
I'm still allergic.

When and if we move on to our 80 acres of Ozark wilderness, we will have cats.  For the reasons you pointed out as well as the fact that momma has to be happy.

Momma likes cats.  So do I.

But,,,,,



I'm still allergic

BTW, cats generally don't go after snakes.  But they do decimate their food supply, IE rodents.  Which is primarily why you don't have snakes.


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## pirate_girl




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## NorthernRedneck

__


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## FrancSevin

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 150791


Those would be paper wasps/ Hornets.


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## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## pirate_girl




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## bczoom




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## Lenny




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## bczoom




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## bczoom

This is supposed to be a real ad.


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## bczoom




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## Mark1911

bczoom said:


> This is supposed to be a real ad.
> 
> View attachment 150884



That's equal to $880 in 2022 money... UNLESS they were paid in 1860 silver dollars (Seated Liberty), which are worth $347 each - for a total of $8,675


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## Mark1911




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## bczoom




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## Umberto




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## Doc




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## Pontoon Princess

actually it was roe vs wade when it was decided some 50 years ago, took the flag out of the classroom, stop saying the pledge, destroyed the Boy Scouts ( yes they had their own problems with honestly ), religious charities, etc etc etc, we have no morals, respect for the law and etc etc etc


bczoom said:


> View attachment 151007


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## bczoom




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## bczoom

An older, tired-looking dog wandered into my yard. I could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was well taken care of. He calmly came over to me, I gave him a few pats on his head. He then followed me into my house, slowly walked down the hall, curled up in the corner and fell asleep. An hour later, he went to the door, and I let him out.
The next day he was back, greeted me in my yard, walked inside and resumed his spot in the hall and again slept for about an hour. This continued off and on for several weeks.
Curious I pinned a note to his collar: 'I would like to find out who the owner of this wonderful sweet dog is and ask if you are aware that almost every afternoon your dog comes to my house for a nap.'...!
The next day he arrived for his nap, with a different note pinned to his collar ... 'HE LIVES IN A HOME, WITH MY NON-STOP CHATTING AND NAGGING WIFE, HE'S TRYING TO CATCH UP ON HIS SLEEP .. CAN I COME WITH HIM TOMORROW??'


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## bczoom




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## bczoom

Questions and answers selected from tests in Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16 year old students! (Don't laugh too hard - one of these may be the president someday.)
Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed? A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: What is a planet? A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans? A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections? A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets a election.
Q: What are steroids? A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age? A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
Q; Name a major disease associated with cigarettes. A: Premature death.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? A: Keep it in the cow.
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (E.g., abdomen.) A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A,E,I,O and U.
Q: What is the Fibula? A: A small lie
Q: What does "varicose" mean? A: Nearby.
Q: What is the most common form of birth control? A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.
Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section." A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome.
Q: What is a seizure? A: A Roman emperor.
Q: What is a terminal illness? A: When you are sick at the airport
Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature? A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.
Q: What does the word "benign" mean? A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
Q: What is a turbine? A: Something an Arab wears on his head.
Q: What is a Hindu? A: It lays eggs.


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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Umberto




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## Ironman




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## Umberto

Ironman said:


> View attachment 151065


Now I’m hungry.


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## bczoom

A lady goes to the doctors.
“What is Irish Viagra?" she asked the doctor.
"It's Viagra dissolved in a cup of coffee. He won't even taste it. Let me know how it goes" he said.
She called the doctor the next day.
"How did it go?" he asked.
"Oh faith, begum and begorrah, doctor, it was horrid. Just terrible, I tell ya!! I'm beside meself!"
"Really? What in the world happened?"
"Well, I did as you advised. The Viagra in his coffee took effect right almost immediately. He jumped straight up, with a smile on his face, a twinkle In his eye and his pants a-bulging fiercely. With one swoop of his arm he sent the cups and saucers flying across the room, then he ripped me clothes to tatters and passionately took me then and there on top of the table. Twas a nightmare, I tell ya, an absolute nightmare!"
"Why so terrible" asked the doctor. Wasn't the sex good?"
"BeGosh!! It was the best sex I've had in 25 years, but sure as I'm sittin here, doctor, I'll never be able to show me face in Starbucks again"


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## bczoom




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## Umberto




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## bczoom




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## pirate_girl




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## bczoom




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## chowderman

bczoom said:


> View attachment 151197



I have interviewed & "tested"something on the order of 200 "welder" applicants.
top pix is typical of the applicant "expertise"
the bottom pix is the only thing we could sell....
and no, not a single upper pix welder could produce the lower pix result.


----------



## Ross 650

chowderman said:


> I have interviewed & "tested"something on the order of 200 "welder" applicants.
> top pix is typical of the applicant "expertise"
> the bottom pix is the only thing we could sell....
> and no, not a single upper pix welder could produce the lower pix result.


I agree.  I was a weld inspector for 30 years and that bottom weld was rare.


----------



## chowderman

(giggle)  my son self taught himself to the dime stack.
 he had a temp position in a Great Lakes shipbuilding facility.

one day it became discovered that union axxhole welders were "stealing" his weld assemblies and (fake-)identifying them as 'their own'

unfortunately for the thieves, the welding inspector quite knew the 'hand' of the various welders and summarily rejected work pieces of the fakers/thieves.
my son eventually quit the OMG! we be union environment.  he had issues with 90% non-work SOP.

so, kudos on your expertise.


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## Lenny




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## Lenny




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## bczoom




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## pirate_girl




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## bczoom




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## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 151284


Typical New York "compact" studio apartment.  We all may someday live in one.


----------



## Mark1911

bczoom said:


> View attachment 151284


The gross part is, that appears to be in the KITCHEN...!


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Mark1911




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## bczoom




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## Ironman




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## Ironman




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## pirate_girl




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## Melensdad

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 151418


It all worked out well for Terry.










						The star of the 'Back up, Terry' fireworks video receives a new wheelchair | CNN
					

Terry has some new wheels, and now he'll be able back it up, roll it forward and so much more.




					www.cnn.com


----------



## J.J. McDaniels

Melensdad said:


> It all worked out well for Terry.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> The star of the 'Back up, Terry' fireworks video receives a new wheelchair | CNN
> 
> 
> Terry has some new wheels, and now he'll be able back it up, roll it forward and so much more.
> 
> 
> 
> 
> www.cnn.com


I'm glad some good came from it all.


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## bczoom

*Warning: Gonorrhea Lectim Pandemic---* *Nation-Wide ALERT!*

Information about Gonorrhea Lectim: The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a virulent new strain of this old disease!

The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim.

It's pronounced "_Gonna re-elect 'em_" and is capable of crippling our current population.

The disease is contracted through dangerous and high risk behavior involving putting your cranium up your rectum.
Many victims contracted it in 2020, when they elected Joe Biden and Liberal Progressives into power, and are now starting to realize how destructive this sickness is.

It's sad because Gonorrhea Lectim is easily cured with a new drug just coming on the market called Votemout.

It's pronounced "_Vote-em-out_."

It can be picked up at your local pharmacy without a doctor's prescription.

You take the first dose now.

The second dose should be taken just before the 2022 elections, otherwise, it could eventually wipe out all life as we presently know it in the USA.


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## bczoom




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## bczoom

From the Hillbilly Book of Manners:
1.Never take a beer to a job interview.
2.Always identify people in your yard before shooting at ’em.
3.YES, it’s considered poor taste to take a cooler to church.
4.If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets.
5.Even if you’re certain that you are included in the will, it is still considered tacky to drive a U-Haul to the funeral home.
-Dining Out
1.If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your fingers covering the label.
2.Avoid throwing bones and food scraps on the floor as the restaurant may not have dogs.
-ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME
1.A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a taxidermist.
2.Do not allow the dog to eat at the table no matter how good his manners are.
-PERSONAL HYGIENE
1.While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one’s OWN truck keys
2.Proper use of toiletries can forestall bathing for several days. However, if you live alone, deodorant is a waste of good money.
3.Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a social no-no, as they tend to detract from a woman’s jewelry and alter the taste of finger foods.
-DATING (OUTSIDE THE FAMILY)
1.Always offer to bait your date’s hook, especially on the first date.
2.Be aggressive. Let her know you’re interested: ‘I’ve been wanting to go out with you since I read that stuff on the bathroom wall two years ago.’
3.Establish with her parents what time she is expected back. Some will say 10:00 PM; others might say ‘Monday.’ If the latter is the answer, it is the man’s responsibility to get her to school on time.
4.Always have a positive comment about your date’s appearance, such as, ‘Ya’ll sure don’t sweat much for a fat gal.’
-WEDDINGS
1.Livestock, usually, is a poor choice for a wedding gift.
2.Kissing the bride for more than 5 seconds may get you shot.
3.For the groom, at least, rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cummerbund and a clean bowling shirt can create too sporty an appearance.
4.Though uncomfortable, say ‘yes’ to socks and shoes for this special occasion.
5.It is not appropriate to tell the groom how good his wife is in the sack.
-DRIVING ETIQUETTE
1.Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun is loaded, and the deer is in sight.
2.When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires always has the right of way.
3.Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape.
4.When sending your wife/girlfriend down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back beer.
5.Never relieve yourself from a moving vehicle, especially when driving.
6.Do not lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession.
-TWO REASONS WHY IT IS HARD TO SOLVE A HILLBILLY MURDER:
1.All the DNA is the same.
2.There are never any dental record


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## bczoom




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## Mark1911




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Ironman




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## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Ironman




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## Melensdad




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## pirate_girl




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## Mark1911




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## Mark1911




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## FrancSevin

Mark1911 said:


> View attachment 151773


He, of anybody, would know.


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Melensdad




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## Melensdad




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## pirate_girl




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## Ironman




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 151895


Uh,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,NO!

Can You say "Elania Bobbit?"


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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom

Definition of a Co-Pilot -

Many years ago on a long Trans-Continental flight, an elderly lady asked if she could visit the cockpit.
When she got up there, she found four crew members. She asked the first what he did, and he explained
that he was the Navigator, and his responsibilities were to keep the aircraft on its track across the earth.

She turned to the 2nd one and asked what he did. He explained that he was the Flight Engineer, and his job
was to monitor and troubleshoot any aircraft or engine system problems to keep the aircraft operating smoothly.

She turned to the 3rd one and asked what he did. He explained that as the Captain, he was responsible for
everything in the aircraft, and to fly the plane and direct everyone in it.

She then turned to the 4th one and asked, "Well young man, what is your job?”
He replied "Ma'am, I am the First Officer, my job is the Captain's sexual advisor."

Somewhat shocked, she said, "I beg your pardon young man, but what do you mean by that ?”
"Very simple ma'am. The Captain has told me on a number of occasions that when he wants my f****** advice, he'll ask me."


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## bczoom




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## bczoom

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to the local grocery store. Unfortunately, like most men; I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from the local store manager:
Dear Mrs. Harris:
Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in our store.
We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you from the store.
Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:
1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money. We don't have a Code 3.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.
6. August 14: Moved a, 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.
8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.
9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.
10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.
11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while, loudly humming the, 'Mission Impossible' theme.
12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his, 'Madonna Look' using different sizes of funnels.
13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'
14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed;
'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the fitting room?
And last, but not least:
16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile; then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out.


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## bczoom




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## pirate_girl




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Doc




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## Ironman




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## FrancSevin




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## pirate_girl




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## Umberto




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## Ironman




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## Ironman




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## bczoom

If you ever feel a little bit stupid, just dig this up and read it again; you'll begin to think you're a genius..
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
(On September 17, 1994, Alabama's Heather Whitestone was selected as Miss America 1995.)
Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,"
--Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."
--Mariah Carey
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life,"
-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body,"
--Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country,"
--Mayor Marion Barry, Washington , DC . ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it,"
--A congressional candidate in Texas ..
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"Half this game is ninety percent mental."
--Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.."
--Al Gore, Vice President
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"I love California . I practically grew up in Phoenix .."
-- Dan Quayle
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?"
--Lee Iacocca
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"The word "genius" isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."
--Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst.
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people."
-- Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC Instructor.
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 2020 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances."
--Department of Social Services, Greenville , South Carolina
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"Traditionally, most of Australia 's imports come from overseas."
--Keppel Enderbery
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
"If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when they wake up dead, there'll be a record."
-- Mark S. Fowler, FCC Chairman
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
Feeling smarter yet?


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Ironman




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## Mark1911




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## Mark1911




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## Ironman




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## Ironman




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## bczoom




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## Ironman




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## EastTexFrank

bczoom said:


> View attachment 152261


I am so going to steal that idea.  I'm not proud.  I'll steal anybody's good ideas and that's a good idea.


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## FrancSevin

I had a four banger in my K car Lebaron convertible.  We used to call that button the "Turbo Boost" Got a full 80 HP outa that puppy.


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## NorthernRedneck




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## NorthernRedneck




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## bczoom




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## NorthernRedneck

bczoom said:


> View attachment 152323



My ex apparently. She has 3 kids with 3 different men.


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## bczoom

THESE ARE ACTUAL COMPLAINTS RECEIVED BY "THOMAS COOK VACATIONS" FROM DISSATISFIED CUSTOMERS:
1. "They should not allow topless sunbathing on the beach. It was very distracting for my husband who just wanted to relax."
2. "On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food."
3. "We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish."
4. "We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our own swimsuits and towels. We assumed it would be included in the price."
5. "The beach was too sandy. We had to clean everything when we returned to our room."
6. "We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as white but it was more yellow."
7. "It's lazy of the local shopkeepers in Puerto Vallartato close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during 'siesta' time -- this should be banned."
8. "No-one told us there would be fish in the water. The children were scared."
9. "Although the brochure said that there was a fully equipped kitchen, there was no egg-slicer in the drawers."
10. "I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local convenience store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts."
11. "The roads were uneven and bumpy, so we could not read the local guide book during the bus ride to the resort. Because of this, we were unaware of many things that would have made our holiday more fun."
12. "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England. It took the Americans only three hours to get home. This seems unfair."
13. "I compared the size of our one-bedroom suite to our friends' three-bedroom and ours was significantly smaller."
14. "The brochure stated: 'No hairdressers at the resort.' We're trainee hairdressers and we think they knew and made us wait longer for service."
15. "When we were in Spain, there were too many Spanish people there. The receptionist spoke Spanish, the food was Spanish. No one told us that there would be so many foreigners."
16. "We had to line up outside to catch the boat and there was no air-conditioning."
17. "It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel."
18. "I was bitten by a mosquito. The brochure did not mention mosquitoes."
19. "My fiancée and I requested twin-beds when we booked, but instead we were placed in a room with a king bed. We now hold you responsible and want to be re-reimbursed for the fact that I became pregnant. This would not have happened if we got the room we booked.


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## bczoom




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## Ironman




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## Mark1911

Ironman said:


> View attachment 152369


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## Ironman

Mark1911 said:


> View attachment 152373


That is some messed up shit, Man.


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom

One day two farmers are chatting and farmer 1 notices that farmer 2 has an odd pig.

Farmer 1: "Hey why does that pig over there only got three legs?"

Farmer 2: "Oh that pig, he's a hero. 'bout a month ago there was a fire at my house and that pig came in and pulled my whole family out of the house while we were sleeping."

Farmer 1: "Oh, so it lost the leg in the fire?"

Farmer 2: "No, a pig like that you don't eat all at once."


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom

CVS is notorious for their extensive receipts.


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## bczoom




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## NorthernRedneck

*...that moment you discover that you're not alone while driving. What to do?*


----------



## pixie

^^ Even more exciting when a mouse runs across your foot. Sorry, no picture !


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## bczoom




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## bczoom

Moses, Jesus, and an old man are playing golf. Moses goes first and hits the ball into a pond. So he goes up, parts the water, walks down in the gap, and hits the ball onto the green. Jesus hits his ball and it bounces on the pond, so he walks out on the water and hits it back on the green. The old man hits the ball, bounces it off a few trees, and the ball rolls over to the edge of the pond. Then, the ball gets eaten by a frog. Then the frog gets snatched by a hawk, and the hawk flies over the green. The frog spits the ball out, and it rolls into the cup. Moses looks at Jesus, and says, "I hate playing golf with your dad."


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## Umberto




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Umberto




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## Ironman




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## bczoom




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom

A cowboy went into a rural Arizona saloon that still had a hitching post. He had a beer. He left and discovered someone had stolen his horse. He walked back in the saloon, fast drew his colt, twirled it around and shot a hole in the ceiling and said, “Whichever one of you coyotes that stole my horse, best return it.” Silence. “Ok, I am going to sit down have one more beer and if my horse isn’t returned, I will do what I did in Laredo, Texas and I HATE doing what I did in Laredo, but I will do what I must,” He said with one hand on his holstered Colt.

He finished his beer and went out and saw his horse hitched. As he mounted, the bartender came out and said. ”Hey cowboy, just curious, what happened in Laredo?” The cowboy shrugged and said, “I had to walk home.”


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Doc




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## Mark1911




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Melensdad




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## Melensdad




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## bczoom




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## Lenny

Mark1911 said:


> View attachment 152626


Yes, but is it right handed or left handed?


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## bczoom




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## bczoom

The light turned yellow, just in front of him.
He did the right thing and stopped at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.
The tailgating woman behind him was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration, as she missed her chance to get through the intersection.
As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer.
The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up.
He took her to the police station where she was searched, fingerprinted, photographed and placed in a holding cell.
After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door.
She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.
He said, ''I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, giving the guy in front of you the finger and cursing at him.
I noticed the 'What Would Jesus Do' bumper sticker, the 'Choose Life' licence plate holder, the 'Follow Me to Sunday-School' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk, so naturally ......
I assumed you had stolen the car.''


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## bczoom




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## pirate_girl




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## bczoom




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## Ironman




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Ironman




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## bczoom




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## NorthernRedneck




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## Doc




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## NorthernRedneck




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## bczoom

Checking out at the supermarket, the young cashier suggested to the much older man, that he should bring his own grocery bags because Plastic bags weren’t good for the environment.

The man apologized and explained, “We didn’t have this ‘green thing’ back in my earlier days.”

The young cashier responded, “That’s our problem today – your generation did not care enough to save our environment for future generations.”

She was right — our generation didn’t have the ‘green thing’ in its day.

Back then, we returned milk bottles, lemonade bottles and beer bottles to the shop. The shop sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were recycled.

But we didn’t have the “green thing” back in our day.

Grocery shops bagged our groceries in brown paper bags, that we re-used for numerous things, most memorable besides household bags for rubbish, was the use of brown paper bags as book covers for our schoolbooks. This was to ensure that public property (the books provided for our use by the school), was not defaced by our scribblings. Then we were able to personalize our books on the brown paper bags.

But too bad we didn’t do the “green thing” back then.

We walked up stairs, because we didn’t have a lift in every supermarket, shop and office building. We walked to the local shop and didn’t climb into a 300 horsepower machine every time we had to go half a mile.

But she was right. We didn’t have the “green thing” in our day.

Back then, we washed the baby’s Terry Towel diapers because we didn’t have the throwaway kind. We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy-gobbling machine burning up 3 kilowatts. Wind and solar power really did dry our clothes back in our early days. Kids had hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing.

But that young lady is right; we didn’t have the “green thing” back in our day

Back then, we had one radio or TV in the house – not a TV in every room and the TV had a small screen the size of a big handkerchief (remember them?), not a screen the size of Scotland in the kitchen. We blended and stirred by hand because we didn’t have electric machines to do everything for us. When we packaged a fragile item to send in the mail, we used wadded up old newspapers to cushion it, not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap. Back then, we didn’t fire up an engine and burn petrol just to cut the lawn. We pushed the mower that ran on human power. We exercised by working so we didn’t need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity.

But she’s right; we didn’t have the “green thing” back then.

We drank from a tap or fountain when we were thirsty instead of using a cup or a plastic bottle every time we had a drink of water. We refilled writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and we replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got dull.

But we didn’t have the “green thing” back then.

Back then, people took the bus and kids rode their bikes to school or walked instead of turning their Mums into a 24-hour taxi service in the family’s $50,000 People Carrier which cost the same as a whole house did before the “green thing.” We had one electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances and we didn’t need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 23,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest restaurant!

But isn’t it sad that the current generation laments how wasteful we old folks were just because we didn’t have the “green thing” back then?


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## Lenny

bczoom said:


> View attachment 152950


Do you have a more gooder one for $77?


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## Umberto

bczoom said:


> View attachment 152677


Having been to nude beaches and spas in Germany, no one cares. There were all sizes and figures.


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Umberto




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Ironman




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## Umberto




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## Umberto

Umberto said:


> View attachment 153017


The price is right.


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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Umberto




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## Ironman




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## Umberto

Ironman said:


> View attachment 153074


I know her.


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## Ironman

Umberto said:


> I know her.


I bet you do


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Umberto




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## Melensdad




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Melensdad




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## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## Ironman




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Ironman




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## NorthernRedneck

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 153206



McDonald's is gross. Burgers are only a couple mm thick and taste like sawdust and oats mixed together.


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## NorthernRedneck




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## bczoom




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## Umberto

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 153171


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## J.J. McDaniels

NorthernRedneck said:


> McDonald's is gross. Burgers are only a couple mm thick and taste like sawdust and oats mixed together.


As a kid, it was all the rave. But as an adult, I haven't eaten there in many, many years.


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## bczoom

A 65 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.

While on the operating table she had a near death experience.. Seeing God she asked "Is my time up?"

God said, "No, you have another 33 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck.

She even had someone come in and change her hair color and brighten her teeth! Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it.

After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.

Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 33 years? Why didn't you pull me from out of the path of the ambulance?"

God replied, "I didn't recognize you!"


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## bczoom




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## Ironman




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## bczoom




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## Melensdad




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## NorthernRedneck




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## bczoom




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## Melensdad

Playing BINGO at the local county fair


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## Umberto




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## bczoom




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## Umberto




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Mark1911




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## NorthernRedneck




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## bczoom




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## Melensdad




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## Ironman




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## bczoom




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## Mark1911

You seriously just can't make this shit up - With everthing going on, THIS is what the left is worried about - hurting the feelings of f@#cking criminals...  Unbelievable.









						New York to scrap 'inmate' in favor of 'incarcerated individual' in state law
					

Democratic New York Gov. Kathy Hochul says referring to prisoners as "inmates" causes a "harmful stigma," so they will now be called "incarcerated individuals."




					www.foxnews.com


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Doc




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## bczoom




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## Umberto




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## bczoom




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## Melensdad




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## bczoom

Thoughts to Ponder.......

Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety-one?

If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea...does that mean that one out of five enjoys it?

Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?

If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car is not called a racist?

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, then doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

Do Lipton Tea employees take 'coffee breaks?'

What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use, Toothpicks?

Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for them while they deliver the mail?

Is it true that you never really learn to swear until you learn to drive?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose?

Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?

Why, Why, Why do we press harder on the remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

Why do banks charge a fee due to insufficient funds; when they already know you're broke?

Why is it that when someone tells you that there are one billion stars in the universe you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint you have to touch it to check?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why did Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose cruel idea was it to put an "s" in the word "lisp"?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that, no matter what color bubble bath you use, the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people run over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it and then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

How do those dead bugs get into the enclosed light fixtures?

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

Why, in winter, do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

REMEMBER, A day without a smile is like a day without sunshine!

And a day without sunshine is, like...........night!!!!


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## bczoom




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## Umberto




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## Doc




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## FrancSevin




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## pirate_girl




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## bczoom




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## Umberto




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## Doc




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## Umberto

Doc said:


> View attachment 153921


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## pirate_girl




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## FrancSevin




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## NorthernRedneck




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Ironman




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## pirate_girl




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Doc




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## Doc




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## pirate_girl




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Melensdad




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## NorthernRedneck

bczoom said:


> View attachment 154116



When I worked with the handicapped many years ago, we worked in 3/4 bedroom homes with handicapped individuals. Well, there were 63 employees in total for 7 houses. I used to start rumors about myself just to see how far it would spread. I told one coworker (who I knew liked to gossip) that I was thinking about applying for a different job elsewhere but didn't say where.  By the next day, news was spreading rampant throughout the agency that I was for  sure quitting and they all had me going to a different agency and knew my start date there etc.  I knew we had a staff meeting that week and did that to prove a point that women like to gossip about anything even if it isn't true and I pointed out my little experiment. I ended up quitting there and going to work in a mill just to avoid the gossip.


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## bczoom




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## bczoom

This would make my day on my next plane trip.


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## bczoom

Or Zucchini


----------



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## bczoom




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## Lenny

bczoom said:


> View attachment 154200


Oh boy!  I say 54 "0"s in that yellow one!


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## Umberto




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## Ironman




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## bczoom




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## Umberto




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## chowderman

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 154337



that would be a paper wasp nest - not a beehive.
and it's obvious that adding a White Anglosaxon Protestant _anything_ in the NBA is a non-starter.


----------



## FrancSevin

chowderman said:


> that would be a paper wasp nest - not a beehive.
> and it's obvious that adding a White Anglosaxon Protestant _anything_ in the NBA is a non-starter.


I have no idea how that is racists.  Perhaps that is because I have no interests in the NBA thing.

But you are spot on with the paper wasp thing.


----------



## power1

FrancSevin said:


> I have no idea how that is racists.  Perhaps that is because I have no interests in the NBA thing.
> 
> But you are spot on with the paper wasp thing.


I agree.  I could never set through a game but with a wasp nest in the game it might be worth a look.


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## bczoom




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## Lenny




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## pirate_girl




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## power1

bczoom said:


> View attachment 154446


I can't understand why they try so hard to make a plant look like meat.  If plants are so great why do they want them to look like meat?


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Doc




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## bczoom




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## Doc




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## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom

I got 16 out of 17. Never had nor heard of PF Flyers from back in the day.


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## bczoom




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## power1

bczoom said:


> View attachment 154576


I always thought we had too many words.  Now we are using the same ones for different meanings.


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> I got 16 out of 17. Never had nor heard of PF Flyers from back in the day.
> 
> View attachment 154583


Busted!

I endured everyone of them.


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## bczoom




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## m1west

bczoom said:


> View attachment 154607


Often wondered as a child watching the show, why didn't they use the topsides to repair the hull or use the materials to build a smaller boat. But that wouldn't have the run they did with the show.


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## bczoom




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## Ross 650

FrancSevin said:


> Busted!
> 
> I endured everyone of them.


Heck I got them all.  I even had PF Fliers once back in 1951.  Doesnt seem like those items were that long ago.  Have a goodun!!


----------



## FrancSevin

Ross 650 said:


> Heck I got them all.  I even had PF Fliers once back in 1951.  Doesnt seem like those items were that long ago.  Have a goodun!!


I was a top dog, I had KED's on my feet


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## Ironman




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## bczoom




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## Doc

The NEW iPhone14 ....same ole same ole same ole ......


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## Ironman




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## pirate_girl




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## Ironman




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## bczoom

BBQ RULES:
We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity . When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:
(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.
Here comes the important part:
(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.
(6) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat
Important again:
(8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.
(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes
And most important of all:
(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ' her night off ', and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

There are five cows on a farm, one mamma cow and four baby calves.
The first baby walks up to the mom and asks, "Momma, why is my name Rose?"
The mommy cow replies, "Well honey, a rose petal fell on your head when you were born."
The next calf comes up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Lily?"
The mother replies, "Because honey, a lily petal fell on your head when you were born."
The third baby comes up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Daisy?"
The momma cow again replieds" Well, when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head."
The final baby walks over and says, "Duh huh guh nuh!"
The momma cow says, "Quiet, Cinderblock


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

A young redneck is swimming in a river. A city man walks up and asks him, “What are you doing in there?”
The redneck says, “I’m washing my clothes.”
The city man asks, “Why don’t you use a washing machine?”
The redneck says, “I tried that, but I got too dizzy.”


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Umberto




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Umberto




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

A high school student stared thoughtfully at the second question on his exam, which read, “State the number of tons of coal shipped out of America in any given year.”

Suddenly, his brow cleared, and he wrote, “1492: None.”


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl

Lee.
Geddy Lee...


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Lenny




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

I feel like I may be in this category.
I sold a car to our previous UPS driver.
Have given and sold stuff to our current driver.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## bczoom

_*Bill wakes up at home with a huge hangover.
He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table.
He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.
Bill looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, and clean.
So's the rest of the house.
He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love you."
So, he goes to the kitchen and sure enough, there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper.
His son is also at the table, eating.
Bill asks, "Son, what happened last night?"
His son says, "Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and delirious.
Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door."
Confused, Bill asks, "So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"
His son replies, "Oh that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off you said, "Lady leave me alone, I'm married!"*_


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 155075


Cats are not from here.  They are Aliens here to watch humanity and report back to the mother ship


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 155132


My son took 32 hours.  Yeah, he heard about it.


----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## BreadHead




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

**


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

'


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

This is me, nearly every day (but most days without the fire).


----------



## bczoom

21 second video.  Funny as hell.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## power1

bczoom said:


> View attachment 155513


Just a short experience I saw.  I was a kid and went to spend the week where my dad worked.  The house he rented was at the end of the street on a hill.  Had a nice window that looked straight down the street.  One day I was setting there looking down the street and saw an elderly woman, well known for her gossip, run across the street to tell her friend what she had heard.  When she stepped out into the street she tripped and fell.  She rolled back up against the curb.  She was on her back and couldn't turn over to get up.  I watched for a while to see what would happen.  Quite a few cars drove down the street and would stop and watch her struggle then laugh and drive on down the road.  I finally got embarrassed for watching and walked down the street and helped her up.


----------



## power1

bczoom said:


> View attachment 155515


I learned a long time ago you can tell anyone anything and get proof of it on google.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## EastTexFrank

Ironman said:


> View attachment 155521



I looks as if Florida is f***ed no matter what happens.


----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## power1

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 155533


I do not allow a person on my property wearing a hoodie.  Around here it is the uniform of a thug.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

It's just under 3 minutes but you'll laugh your ass off all the way through it.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

Pun-ish-ment - Playing with words....

1. _Dad, are we pyromaniacs? Yes, we arson._
2. _What do you call a pig with laryngitis? Disgruntled._
3. _Writing my name in cursive is my signature move._
4. _Why do bees stay in their hives during winter? Swarm._
5. _If you’re bad at haggling, you’ll end up paying the price._
6. _Just so everyone’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on._
7. _A commander walks into a bar and orders everyone around._
8. _I lost my job as a stage designer. I left without making a scene._
9. _Never buy flowers from a monk. Only you can prevent florist friars._
10. _How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced? A buccaneer._
11. _I once worked at a cheap pizza shop to get by. I kneaded the dough._
12. _My friends and I have named our band ‘Duvet’. It’s a cover band._
13. _I lost my girlfriend’s audiobook, and now I’ll never hear the end of it._
14. _Why is ‘dark’ spelled with a k and not c? Because you can’t see in the dark._
15. _Why is it unwise to share your secrets with a clock? Well, time will tell._
16. _When I told my contractor I didn’t want carpeted steps, they gave me a blank stare._
17. _Bono__ and __The Edge__ walk into a Dublin bar and the bartender says, “Oh no, not __U2__ again.”_
18. _Prison is just one word to you, but for some people, it’s a whole sentence._
19. _Scientists got together to study the effects of alcohol on a person’s walk, and the result was staggering._
20. _I’m trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but good players are really hard to find._
21. _I got over my addiction to chocolate, marshmallows, and nuts. I won’t lie, it was a rocky road._
22. _What do you say to comfort a friend who’s struggling with grammar? There, their, they’re._
23. _I went to the toy store and asked the assistant where the Schwarznegger dolls are and he replied, “Aisle B, back.”_
24. _What did the surgeon say to the patient who insisted on closing up their own incision? Suture self._
25. _I’ve started telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes. It’s all about raisin awareness_


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## power1

bczoom said:


> View attachment 155572


I used to have a chicken that could count to nine.  Don't know if he could count any higher or not.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl

Just no! Lol


----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

Oops, that's a 330 gallon IBC tote that appears to be completely full.  That means it's over 2600 pounds.


----------



## bczoom

Don't litter, especially in front of this guy!

A great 45 second video.


View attachment 62781-f7ef363a6991445cc85b0fddb293f774.mp4


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## power1

bczoom said:


> Oops, that's a 330 gallon IBC tote that appears to be completely full.  That means it's over 2600 pounds.
> 
> 
> View attachment 155669


I put two of them in a small dodge pickup and drove home.  Front end was sort of light but I got them there.


----------



## power1

bczoom said:


> Don't litter, especially in front of this guy!
> 
> A great 45 second video.
> 
> 
> View attachment 155670


When he opened my door he would have been met with my 357 magnum.


----------



## chowderman

power1 said:


> When he opened my door he would have been met with my 357 magnum.


look at the license plates.

not gonna' happen there.


----------



## power1

chowderman said:


> look at the license plates.
> 
> not gonna' happen there.


I don't go anywhere without at least one gun.  Most of the time more than one.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 155755


----------



## pirate_girl

Just sayin..


----------



## bczoom

I heard this interchange is in China.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman

Sneak peek 2024 chevy.


----------



## Melensdad

If you really want to screw up a kid's life on Halloween night . . .


----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels

What the HELL????????


----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Umberto




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## MNwr786

Had to borrow an old one from this thread back on page 157 and make a change to it...


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Doc




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## FrancSevin

Melensdad said:


> View attachment 156282


I'm in!

Fresh bottle of Knob's Creek on hand


----------



## Doc

Sharks photographed upside down.


----------



## Ross 650

Look like some folks that I worked with!!!


----------



## Umberto




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## BreadHead




----------



## Doc




----------



## Pontoon Princess




----------



## pirate_girl

Accurate! Lol


----------



## Ironman




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Pontoon Princess




----------



## Gary O'




----------



## Umberto




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## BreadHead




----------



## tommu56




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Pontoon Princess




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Umberto




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Pontoon Princess




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Umberto

pirate_girl said:


> View attachment 156535


----------



## pirate_girl

Lol


----------



## Doc




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## MNwr786

bczoom said:


> View attachment 156608


Where's the cold beer?


----------



## pirate_girl

Yep!


----------



## Doc




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels

I couldn't pass this one up!


----------



## BreadHead




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## FrancSevin

Ironman said:


> View attachment 156777View attachment 156778


Unfortunately, the Forum only lets me "LIKE" once so

LIKE!
LIKE!
LIKE!
LIKE!
LIKE!
LIKE!
LIKE!


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## tommu56




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 156844


Sitting on the porch with grandma snapping peas and quilting parties would also help.


----------



## tommu56

How do you prevent getting a tan line like this.


----------



## Umberto

FrancSevin said:


> Sitting on the porch with grandma snapping peas and quilting parties would also help.


I used to sit on the porch swing with my grandmother and watch the cars drive by.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## Umberto




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Reason10

NorthernRedneck said:


> View attachment 134734


Now THAT'S the funniest thing I've ever seen.


----------



## Reason10

EastTexFrank said:


> Nope and if I ever found myself somewhere that I could, I'd leave.


Hell, there are places in Florida in the summer where you can prepare an entire Benihana sauteed meal on the sidewalk.


----------



## FrancSevin

Ironman said:


> View attachment 156896


I don't remember watching Luciano Pavarotti movies.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Pontoon Princess




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Doc




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## Gary O'




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## NorthernRedneck

Hmmmm. This might be a cool accessory for the side by side.


----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Reason10

bczoom said:


> View attachment 146667


I wouldn't doubt it.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## pirate_girl

Mark1911 said:


> View attachment 157205


----------



## tommu56

Mark1911 said:


> View attachment 157205


please can I unsee this????


----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## FrancSevin

Umberto said:


> View attachment 157239


Give her a break....
She is wearing a top that says
"ARMY"

If true, she earned the right to wear the cap.


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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Doc




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## Doc




----------



## Ironman

Thomas Wadhouse was an English circus performer who lived in the 18th century. He is most famously known for having the world's longest nose, which measured 7.5 inches (19 cm) long.


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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Umberto

Jumpin' Jack McDaniels said:


> View attachment 157317


Give ‘em a break, they speak Portuguese.


----------



## Doc




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## Umberto

FrancSevin said:


> Give her a break....
> She is wearing a top that says
> "ARMY"
> 
> If true, she earned the right to wear the cap.


If not, take it off, hat and sweatshirt.


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## Umberto




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Doc




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## Umberto




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## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




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## J.J. McDaniels




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## Ironman




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## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




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## Mark1911

Ironman said:


> View attachment 157445


That looks an awful lot like Hunter…


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## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## bczoom

This one is for Bob.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Umberto




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Pontoon Princess




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




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## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc

Still trying to figure out what went wrong for the Buckeyes yesterday.


----------



## Ironman




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## NorthernRedneck

Tesla owner saving the world.


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 157940


All of the above;;

........for starters


----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## Doc




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels

Naturally.


----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom

Want to play right now?


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## FrancSevin

bczoom said:


> View attachment 157975


And now I understand what the term meant when my dad kicked me out of the house!
_ "That's the last straw"_ he said.


----------



## Doc




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc

Punk's not dead .....


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## Umberto




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## Umberto

View attachment 158184


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Umberto




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

_INNOCENCE IS PRICELESS_

One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex standing in the foyer of the church staring up at a large plaque. It was covered with names and small American flags mounted on either side of it. The six-year old had been staring at the plaque
for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood beside the little boy, and said quietly,
"Good morning, Alex."

"Good morning, Pastor," he replied, still focused on the plaque.

"Pastor, what is this?"
The pastor said, "Well son, it's a memorial to all the young men and women who died in the service."

Soberly, they just stood together, staring at the large plaque.

Finally, little Alex's voice, barely audible and trembling with fear asked, "Which service, the 8:15 or the 10:30?"


----------



## bczoom




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## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Umberto

bczoom said:


> View attachment 158258


That is right by an art store we frequent in Seattle.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

Isn't this the truth...


----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

Been here before...


----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## Umberto




----------



## Umberto




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## Lenny




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Umberto




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



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----------



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----------



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----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom

^^^ If you don't get it, you should.   If not, ask.


----------



## mla2ofus

OK, I'll ask.


----------



## bczoom

Die Hard - the movie.  Those are the bad guys.
Never intended to be but the movie is rated one of the highest Christmas movies.


----------



## FrancSevin

mla2ofus said:


> OK, I'll ask.


For the record, despite it being one of my favorite "Christmas" movies, I didn't get it either


----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Ironman




----------



## FTG-05

bczoom said:


> View attachment 158688


RIP Theo!


----------



## Mark1911

FTG-05 said:


> RIP Theo!


And Hans…:-(


----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## NorthernRedneck




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Lenny

J.J. McDaniels said:


> View attachment 158737


Yep.  And hunting licenses and can't hunt for shit and fishing licenses and can't for fish, etc.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels

Lenny said:


> Yep.  And hunting licenses and can't hunt for shit and fishing licenses and can't for fish, etc.


Makes you wonder why they even bother with it in the first place. Just to show off?


----------



## Lenny

J.J. McDaniels said:


> Makes you wonder why they even bother with it in the first place. Just to show off?


Yep.  That's it.  Some stupid degree that doesn't even qualify them to clean the kitchen floor but they brag about it while working at McDonalds.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels

Lenny said:


> Yep.  That's it.  Some stupid degree that doesn't even qualify them to clean the kitchen floor but they brag about it while working at McDonalds.


Yep, that sounds about right.


----------



## Ironman

Lenny said:


> Yep.  And hunting licenses and can't hunt for shit and fishing licenses and can't for fish, etc.


Hopefully airline pilots ain’t like that


----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## Umberto




----------



## pirate_girl

Nobody happy


----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Umberto




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Umberto




----------



## Umberto




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Lenny




----------



## pirate_girl




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Doc




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Umberto




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Melensdad




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Ironman




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Emmaroy

Mark1911 said:


> View attachment 159091


That generation of idiot derelicts deserves everything they get. I especially like the ones that look like they fell face first into a fishing tackle box then wonder why no one will hire them. Dumb as can possibly be.


----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## FrancSevin

That's from back in the day when Hollywood could portray a sitcom with a worthless white liberal son-in-law as a running joke and get away with it.


----------



## Umberto




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc




----------



## Doc

Seems like fair warning.


----------



## J.J. McDaniels




----------



## Mark1911




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## bczoom




----------



## Umberto




----------



## Doc




----------



## Ironman




----------



## Ironman

What the heck?


----------

