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The Lone Ranger

pirate_girl

legendary ⚓
FF Patron
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]The Lone Ranger is captured by Indians...The Indian Chief proclaims, 'So, you are the great Lone Ranger. In honor of the Harvest Festival, you will be executed in three days. But, before I kill you, I will grant you three requests. What is your first request?

The Lone Ranger responds, 'I'd like to speak to my horse.' The Chief nods and Silver is brought before the Lone Ranger, who whispers in Silver's ear, and the horse gallops away.

Later that evening, Silver returns with a beautiful blonde woman on his back. As the Indian Chief watches, the blonde enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night. The next morning the Indian Chief admits he's impressed. 'You have a very fine and loyal horse, but I will still kill you in two days. What is your second request?'

The Lone Ranger again asks to speak to his horse. Silver is brought to him, and once again he whispers in the horse's ear.

As before, Silver takes off across the plains and disappears over the horizon. Later that evening, to the Chief's surprise, Silver again returns, this time with a brunette, even more attractive than the blonde. She enters the Lone Ranger's tent and also spends the night. The following morning the Indian Chief is again impressed. He tells the Lone Ranger, 'You are indeed a man of many talents, but I still kill you tomorrow. 'So what is your last request?'

The Lone Ranger responds, 'I'd like to speak to my horse.... alone.' The Chief is curious, but he agrees and Silver is brought to the Lone Ranger's tent. Once they're alone, the Lone Ranger grabs Silver by both ears, looks him square in the eye and says:


'Listen very carefully you dumb ass horse. For the last time . . . BRING POSSEEEE!!'.
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One day the Lone Ranger and Tonto rode into town after a hard day of chasing bad guys.

They tied their horses to the rail and went into the parlor for a Sarsaparilla.

Moments later a voice called out from behind, "Who belongs to that white horse?"

The Ranger whipped around, gun in hand.

"I do, why?"

"It looks like it's gonna keel over from heat stroke," came the answer.

Tonto, being the good friend that he was, went out and began running around the horse to create a cooling breeze.

Soon another called out from behind, "Who belongs to that white horse?"

Again the Ranger whipped around, gun in hand.

"I do, why?"

"You left your injun running.":
 
One day the Lone Ranger and Tonto were riding the range when Tonto got off his horse and stuck his ear to the ground.

"Buffalo Come," he stated to the Ranger.

"That's amazing!" The Ranger shook his head in awe. "How can you tell?"

"Ear stickum to ground," came the response.
 
One day the Lone Ranger and Tonto were riding the range when Tonto got off his horse and stuck his ear to the ground.

"Buffalo Come," he stated to the Ranger.

"That's amazing!" The Ranger shook his head in awe. "How can you tell?"

"Ear stickum to ground," came the response.

NOW I DON'T CARE WHO YA ARE, THAT'S FUNNY!!
 
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