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once in awhile a newspaper prints something worth reading
- Thread starter grizzer
- Start date
California
Charter Member
So true. That article could describe both my parents as they waited for death.
Dad lived as if he was going to go on forever, no concern for death, until age 87. Then after some health crises, he recognised that he had reached the final stage of living. His mind was as at least as sharp as that guy but when he got a feeding tube stuck in the side of his belly and couldn't enjoy eating, he said there was no reason to go on. He could walk and chose live alone but said it wasn't fair to continue. He described himself as a walking dead man and said the hospital should have allowed him to pass away peacefully instead of putting in a feeding tube. He called me over and in a few sessions, we wrapped up the loose ends so his Trust was ready to distribute immediately upon his death. He mentioned that he wished we lived in Oregon where he could direct me to go ahead and arrange his death. A month later he had a minor stroke then a major one the same evening in the hospital.
Mom on the other hand got to that point, 90 years old like that guy, then hung at that stage through another eight years and many, many crises. She finally, with clear mind, refused one more trip in the FD's ambulance and died at home that evening.
I think both parents thought of death as a ceremony, to be arranged and managed with dignity to the limited extent that this is possible, as much as it is a medical defeat. I admire them.
And I have great respect for that guy in the article.
Dad lived as if he was going to go on forever, no concern for death, until age 87. Then after some health crises, he recognised that he had reached the final stage of living. His mind was as at least as sharp as that guy but when he got a feeding tube stuck in the side of his belly and couldn't enjoy eating, he said there was no reason to go on. He could walk and chose live alone but said it wasn't fair to continue. He described himself as a walking dead man and said the hospital should have allowed him to pass away peacefully instead of putting in a feeding tube. He called me over and in a few sessions, we wrapped up the loose ends so his Trust was ready to distribute immediately upon his death. He mentioned that he wished we lived in Oregon where he could direct me to go ahead and arrange his death. A month later he had a minor stroke then a major one the same evening in the hospital.
Mom on the other hand got to that point, 90 years old like that guy, then hung at that stage through another eight years and many, many crises. She finally, with clear mind, refused one more trip in the FD's ambulance and died at home that evening.
I think both parents thought of death as a ceremony, to be arranged and managed with dignity to the limited extent that this is possible, as much as it is a medical defeat. I admire them.
And I have great respect for that guy in the article.
That was a good read. A little difficult for me in that I'm currently staying with my Mom who is dieing from pancreatic cancer. She is living this life right now and I am doing everything in my power to make sure that she is not alone as the man in the story is. To me that would be the ultimate sadness.
California
Charter Member
Av8r you have a good heart.