Danang Sailor
nullius in verba
... didn't pull their punches. Here are two stories from my introduction to mid-western politics during my early teens.
**********
The mayor of a small town (population 35,000) was giving a re-election speech in the town square. After running on
for over an hour, saying essentially nothing, even most of his supporters had left. The editor of the county weekly moved
to the front row and stretched out across several chairs. Seeing this the mayor said, "I guess I'd better wrap this up.
Our esteemed local press seems to be getting tired and in need of a rest!" To which the editor replied, "Take your time ...
I can lie down here at least as long as you can lie up there!"
**********
The Republican and Democrat vying for a vacant spot on the County Commission were not only political rivals; they had
been carrying on a private feud for years. During a 'Meet the Candidates' forum at the local union hall, with people in
attendance from the IBEW, AFL-CIO, and several other politically powerful trade unions, the Republican candidate
ended his spiel by saying, "In conclusion, let me remind you that, in the end, there is really only one honest way to make
a living!"
The Democrat knew an opening when he saw it, and immediately jumped to his feet and yelled, "Only one
honest way, you say? Perhaps, here in front of these representatives of many different trades, you'd care to
tell us what that one honest job is?" There was a great muttering and the Democrat knew he'd scored big; his
opponent was in deep shit no matter what job he mentioned. However, what the Republican actually DID say got the Dem
laughed out of the hall: "You know, I was pretty damned certain that YOU wouldn't know!"
**********
The mayor of a small town (population 35,000) was giving a re-election speech in the town square. After running on
for over an hour, saying essentially nothing, even most of his supporters had left. The editor of the county weekly moved
to the front row and stretched out across several chairs. Seeing this the mayor said, "I guess I'd better wrap this up.
Our esteemed local press seems to be getting tired and in need of a rest!" To which the editor replied, "Take your time ...
I can lie down here at least as long as you can lie up there!"
**********
The Republican and Democrat vying for a vacant spot on the County Commission were not only political rivals; they had
been carrying on a private feud for years. During a 'Meet the Candidates' forum at the local union hall, with people in
attendance from the IBEW, AFL-CIO, and several other politically powerful trade unions, the Republican candidate
ended his spiel by saying, "In conclusion, let me remind you that, in the end, there is really only one honest way to make
a living!"
The Democrat knew an opening when he saw it, and immediately jumped to his feet and yelled, "Only one
honest way, you say? Perhaps, here in front of these representatives of many different trades, you'd care to
tell us what that one honest job is?" There was a great muttering and the Democrat knew he'd scored big; his
opponent was in deep shit no matter what job he mentioned. However, what the Republican actually DID say got the Dem
laughed out of the hall: "You know, I was pretty damned certain that YOU wouldn't know!"