• Please be sure to read the rules and adhere to them. Some banned members have complained that they are not spammers. But they spammed us. Some even tried to redirect our members to other forums. Duh. Be smart. Read the rules and adhere to them and we will all get along just fine. Cheers. :beer: Link to the rules: https://www.forumsforums.com/threads/forum-rules-info.2974/

Lunch with my Dad

lilnixon

AKA LILVIXEN
I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes. We
decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was watching a
teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all
different colors: green, red, orange, and blue. My dad kept staring
at him. The teenager would look and find him staring every time.

When the teenager had enough , he sarcastically asked, "What's the
matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?"

Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke
on his response; knowing he would have a good one. And in classic
style he did not bat an eye in his response.

"Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if
you were my son." :applause: :yum: :coolshade
 
That's funnier than my FIL at Walmart... He and I share exactly three things in common. In no particular order: 1) Beer 2) Love for his daughter 3) a huge hatred for the lazy people who can't make it to the cart corrals with their empty shopping carts. Now.. my FIL is like 66 now. He is a retired LTC, special forces. He is about 5'10" and 190 lbs now I would guess. Just looks like a normal old man of course..not that 66 is that old guys, but u know... So he is leaving Walmart the other day and sees this lazy f'er about to leave his cart between two cars. So with his funny little Hungarian accent and a cigarette in his hand non-chalantly says, "I would not leave that cart there if I were you unless you want to take it home attached to your ass." :yum::yum::yum:

The guy never said a word, but found the cart corral.

I thought I was gonna tangle with a kid going into Walmart one day too... buddy of mine and I were walkin in as some Goth looking guy with chains all over was ahead of us. I looked to the buddy and asked if he knew what the chains were for.. he shook his head and said no.. I said "so you don't have to look for anything to hang him from the tree with." This was NOT a racist comment. They guy was whiter than I am. He turned around and started to open his mouth, but changed his mind. Not sure why... I am not scary by any means... until I get mad anyway... :smileywac
 
Top