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Creative? Writing....

H

humor_me

New member
I just couldn't resist. This forum had "Never" on it. It looked so out of place here in the asylum.

So, here goes :tiphat:



As seen on the men's room stall door at a truck stop in TEXAS:

Here I sit with a broken heart,
Took all my pills now my truck won't start.

To which someone answered:

If your damned pills were any good
you'd get off your butt and give her a jump.
 
Thanks Humor_Me! Glad to see someone post here. I was expecting Mith ...but you beat him to it.


....another restroom wall tidbit:

Here I sit all Broken Hearted
Tried to shit but only Farted!
 
I tried Doc but couldnt come up with anything, and apart from my eye developing a habit of twitching uncontrollably at inconveneint times nothing much has happened to inspire me lately.
I guess there was yesterday when I was walking home and saw a load of sheep in a field. While I looked trying to spot Ursla I walked into a random bollard by the side of the road that caught me at just the wrong height thus causing me to have to sit on it for 10 mins to recover the use of my legs and my eyes to stop watering.
Been trying a new tactic of working more and eating more instead of sitting down lots to try and, actually now I think about it I cant remember why im doing it, but I am, and all its done is make me pissed off and tired. On the plus side Ive got lots done and made less stupid mistakes, well apart from the small bodily fire I had, and overall I feel Ive acheived more with my time.
Not only that but I had to get rid of the scrap that I keep, some people have dogs, I have scrap, so the lawn is (almost) totally scrap free for the first time in however many years (3). Makes me well up in my eyes just thinkin of it :(
So Ive just got in from my new active regime, today amoungst other things I tryed to fixed a gear box by swapping parts with another broken one. nearly had it done but I knoced one of the casing with my elbow and dumped dirty gear oil down my leg into my boot, got pissed off, yelled, ripped a curtain of the wall and tripped over a pile of mower decks in the shed for servicing and getting in the way so I decided to call it quits and came inside to sit down for 5 minutes placing a nice clear greasy hand print on my nice white walls. Actually it looks quite good so I might leave it there until it gets really hard to get off so I can have something else to spend ages doing beacuse I didnt do it earlier.
So there you go, thats the writing part. For the creative part I might go cremate a pizza in the oven for eats. Screw the poetry part, though I might scratch your little 2 liner on the bathroom door cos its funny, dopes that count.
Mmmmm..pizza......
 
When I was young, and had less sense,;)

I rubbed my crank, on an electric fence.:eek:

It curled my hair, and tickled my balls. :smileywac

And made me dump in my overhauls.:4_11_9:


:beer: :beer:
 
There once was a girl who begat,
three babes named Nat, Pat, and Tat,
was fun in the breeding,
but hell in the feeding,
when there wasn't enough tit for Tat.
-From an unknown author
 
Those who write on shithouse walls
roll their shit in little balls

Those who read these words of wit
Eat those little balls of shit

(from some stall in VA long long ago)
 
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