Bullying

[thcri]

Just seems you hear too much of it lately. Yesterday a beautiful young 13 year old girl committed suicide and bullying is the blame. I wonder has bullying gotten worse or re the kids more sensitive to it. Either way the trend is not good. Someone told me that we have had 5 kids commit suicide in our area this year.

 

[muleman]

I think with today's technology it has made it easier for kids to do nasty things without physically touching another kid. And it makes the news a lot more.

 

[Doc]

I think it's a combination of both. Kids are more sensitive because of our PC society. They are set up to fail when as a kid everything they do is applauded and no team is allowed to lose.
Add to that the fact, like Muley said, with technology it is easier to bully from afar without touching them. Facebook gives bullies a way to reach out to all the friends of their target. Very powerful, and can devastate youngsters who simply have no clue how to handle the situation. Sad.

 

[pirate_girl]

It's not just kids who are using today's technology to do this crap.
So - called adults do it too.

 

[Doc]

It's not just kids who are using today's technology to do this crap.
So - called adults do it too.

True but the targeted adults know how to handle it without taking their own life (at least most of them do).
Kids to often think it's the end of the world and kill themselves. They don't yet realize if they stuck it out most likely they'd see things turn completely around and they'd be the successful one once out of school and they'd see the bullies begging for change on the street corner or at least knocked down off of their high horses.

 

[pirate_girl]

True but the targeted adults know how to handle it without taking their own life (at least most of them do).
Kids to often think it's the end of the world and kill themselves. They don't yet realize if they stuck it out most likely they'd see things turn completely around and they'd be the successful one once out of school and they'd see the bullies begging for change on the street corner or at least knocked down off of their high horses.

Yes, I know Doc.
We had a kid here in town shoot himself because of things said on Facebook.
He was one of the more popular kids on the football team.

 

[tiredretired]

Just seems you hear too much of it lately. Yesterday a beautiful young 13 year old girl committed suicide and bullying is the blame. I wonder has bullying gotten worse or re the kids more sensitive to it. Either way the trend is not good. Someone told me that we have had 5 kids commit suicide in our area this year.

Many say it is worse now because it now follows the kids home to those that use social media sites.

My grandson Trevor has been removed from the public school system and is now being home schooled because of the bullying. Actually, he was good at defending himself but there was a group that was always testing him and he tooks some licks and dished them out as well. Terrible situation. The final straw was he getting suspended because he defended himself. The other kids had the bruises and the black eye so those in charge determined he was the bully. They started it, he finished it.

I'm a conservative so I do not play the race card but you can now get the gist of what I am saying.

 

[bczoom]

IMHO, a lot of it has to do with the wussification of the newest generation (whatever they're called now... gen Y?).

I'm in a position where we do a bunch of things with young boys (I won't name the organization), and we have to watch for bullying very closely. We don't tolerate it and take classes on the subject...

We've had some incidents where a boy or the boy's parent will approach a leader with something to the effect of "name is bullying me". We take that very seriously and all Leaders will then watch and/or talk to the boy being called out for bullying. In almost every case, it's not bullying per se, it's just boys playing hard. A stronger boy may not know his strength and the underdog calls it bullying. The stronger has not singled out this boy but is just stronger. Once we've identified whether it's bullying or just kids playing hard, we call the offender and his parent(s) in and discuss. Normally it's just playing too rough so we explain and ask him to tone it down a bit.

I think the word "bullying" is being over-played. I'm not saying there's not true cases of it just that there's a lot of cases of "crying wolf".

 

[XeVfTEUtaAqJHTqq]

I think it's been going on for a long time we just hear about it more. Also, there are more people around now.

 

[XeVfTEUtaAqJHTqq]

IMHO, a lot of it has to do with the wussification of the newest generation (whatever they're called now... gen Y?).

I'm in a position where we do a bunch of things with young boys (I won't name the organization), and we have to watch for bullying very closely. We don't tolerate it and take classes on the subject...

We've had some incidents where a boy or the boy's parent will approach a leader with something to the effect of "name is bullying me". We take that very seriously and all Leaders will then watch and/or talk to the boy being called out for bullying. In almost every case, it's not bullying per se, it's just boys playing hard. A stronger boy may not know his strength and the underdog calls it bullying. The stronger has not singled out this boy but is just stronger. Once we've identified whether it's bullying or just kids playing hard, we call the offender and his parent(s) in and discuss. Normally it's just playing too rough so we explain and ask him to tone it down a bit.

I think the word "bullying" is being over-played. I'm not saying there's not true cases of it just that there's a lot of cases of "crying wolf".

This too!

Too many helicopter parents.

 

[loboloco]

I have to s ay this.
For thousands of years kids have been bullied. They have been beaten, raped, tortured, used as cheap labor, enslaved and abandoned by parents and circumstance.
If many of these children survived and built our civilization, what has changed?
While I don't advocate bullying( I had to fight it growing up), I don't really see it being the crisis many have made it out to be.
I realize technology has made it more invasive, but IMHO it goes back to parenting. Those taught well will get thru it, those given only feel good life lessons are more likely to opt out.

 

[tiredretired]

I have to s ay this.
For thousands of years kids have been bullied. They have been beaten, raped, tortured, used as cheap labor, enslaved and abandoned by parents and circumstance.
If many of these children survived and built our civilization, what has changed?
While I don't advocate bullying( I had to fight it growing up), I don't really see it being the crisis many have made it out to be.
I realize technology has made it more invasive, but IMHO it goes back to parenting. Those taught well will get thru it, those given only feel good life lessons are more likely to opt out.

Well, in my grandsons case, his parents (my son & DIL) were just as concerned for the safety of the other children as they were for Trevor. Almost. He is halfway to a black belt himself and is not afraid to defend himself if need be. As I said earlier, it was a very tough situation all the way around. The school did nothing, basically. My kids found themselves being more of an advocate for the safety of the "bullies" than the bully's parents or guardians.

The breakdown of family core unit has worsened the situation from when we were kids, IMHO. YMMV, I don't know. Just relaying my grandsons experiences and his parents being concerned for everyone in this situation. I am proud of the way they handled it.

 

[loboloco]

Well, in my grandsons case, his parents (my son & DIL) were just as concerned for the safety of the other children as they were for Trevor. Almost. He is halfway to a black belt himself and is not afraid to defend himself if need be. As I said earlier, it was a very tough situation all the way around. The school did nothing, basically. My kids found themselves being more of an advocate for the safety of the "bullies" than the bully's parents or guardians.

The breakdown of family core unit has worsened the situation from when we were kids, IMHO. YMMV, I don't know. Just relaying my grandsons experiences and his parents being concerned for everyone in this situation. I am proud of the way they handled it.

Ssw this i another thread. Yep, they did the best in the circumstances. I honestly believe that kids should be taught that the world is a tough place where nobody gives you anything. You have to work for it. And even then you might not get what you want.

 

[SShepherd]

Many say it is worse now because it now follows the kids home to those that use social media sites.

My grandson Trevor has been removed from the public school system and is now being home schooled because of the bullying. Actually, he was good at defending himself but there was a group that was always testing him and he tooks some licks and dished them out as well. Terrible situation. The final straw was he getting suspended because he defended himself. The other kids had the bruises and the black eye so those in charge determined he was the bully. They started it, he finished it.

I'm a conservative so I do not play the race card but you can now get the gist of what I am saying.

you have the core of the issue right there. Kids are allowed to bully, but they're not allowed to defend themselves. When I went to school, you fight you get 3 days suspension. Now you fight and it's 180 days!!!! That's total bullshit. Sometimes the only way to get it resolved is to let them slug it out. Unfortunatly, the pussification of america and overblown PC pushed by the public school system is killing kids. Some snap, killing a bunch of classmates-others snap and kill themselves.

 

[tiredretired]

Sometimes the only way to get it resolved is to let them slug it out.

Yup. Lobo said the same thing essentially and I agree with the both of you. My Dad taught me that I was going to take some licks and dish some out. That's the way it is. He also said that if I was fighting in school that I had damn well better be right. Win or lose. He would stand behind me and he did. He also taught me that if I ever went out looking for a scrap, that the chances were very, very good I would find one.

 

[JEV]

When i hear of bullying I'm always reminded of my friend, Ralphy, and his "Popeye" attitude. "I stood all I can stands, and I can't stands no more."

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XvijyBIgazE"]A Christmas Story - Ralphie Beats Up Bully - YouTube[/ame]