Dargo
Like a bad penny...
Sorry if this is old, but many of these appealed to me because 4 out of the 5 voices in my head said I should appreciate them.....
WHATEVER HITS THE FAN WILL
NOT BE DISTRIBUTED EVENLY.
I have kleptomania,
but when it gets bad,
I take something for it..
Sometimes too much to drink isn't enough.
Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!
Welcome to Utah
Set your watch back 20 years.
In just two days from now,
tomorrow will be yesterday.
A bartender is just a pharmacist
with a limited inventory.
The statement below is true.
The statement above is false.
I may be schizophrenic,
but at least I have each other.
I am a Nobody.
Nobody is Perfect.
Therefore I am Perfect.
KENTUCKY:
Five million people,
Fifteen last names.
In Memorium
With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry LaPrise, the man who wrote "TheHokey Pokey", died peacefully at age 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in. And then the trouble started.
I LOVE COOKING WITH WINE
Sometimes I even put it in the food.
Preserve the Spotted Owl
(in formaldehyde)
Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln,
how was the play?
When you work here,
you can name your own salary...
I named mine "Fred".
Money isn't everything,
but it sure keeps the kids in touch.
Reality is only an illusion
that occurs due to a lack of alcohol
I like cats too.
Let's exchange recipes.
Red meat is not bad for you
Fuzzy green meat is bad for you.
I am having an out-of-money experience.
Corduroy pillows are making headlines!
I want to die while asleep like my grandfather,
not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car.
WHATEVER HITS THE FAN WILL
NOT BE DISTRIBUTED EVENLY.
I have kleptomania,
but when it gets bad,
I take something for it..
Sometimes too much to drink isn't enough.
Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!
Welcome to Utah
Set your watch back 20 years.
In just two days from now,
tomorrow will be yesterday.
A bartender is just a pharmacist
with a limited inventory.
The statement below is true.
The statement above is false.
I may be schizophrenic,
but at least I have each other.
I am a Nobody.
Nobody is Perfect.
Therefore I am Perfect.
KENTUCKY:
Five million people,
Fifteen last names.
In Memorium
With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry LaPrise, the man who wrote "TheHokey Pokey", died peacefully at age 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in. And then the trouble started.
I LOVE COOKING WITH WINE
Sometimes I even put it in the food.
Preserve the Spotted Owl
(in formaldehyde)
Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln,
how was the play?
When you work here,
you can name your own salary...
I named mine "Fred".
Money isn't everything,
but it sure keeps the kids in touch.
Reality is only an illusion
that occurs due to a lack of alcohol
I like cats too.
Let's exchange recipes.
Red meat is not bad for you
Fuzzy green meat is bad for you.
I am having an out-of-money experience.
Corduroy pillows are making headlines!
I want to die while asleep like my grandfather,
not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car.
