K
kermit2
Guest
A guy goes into a bar and orders a shot of Jack with a short beer chaser. After having 4 or 5 rounds, he knocks back another shot, but this one doesn't sit well and he erps it up, getting a bit of puke on the front of his shirt. He's cussing about it and the bartender asks him what the problem is. He says his wife has been on him lately about his drinking and now he has puke on his shirt. "She's gonna kill me!" The bartender tells him to quit worrying as he's seen this before and has a plan. "Take a 10 dollar bill, fold it up and put it in your shirt pocket. Then when your wife gives you some shit, pull out the bill and tell her that some drunk at the bar puked on you but he gave you 10 dollars to have your shirt cleaned". He thought this over and said, "That's pretty good! And I think she'll fall for it! Give me a double!" By the time he goes home, the guy is smashed. Sure enough, his wife is waiting and she immediately sees the puke on him and starts raving about his drinking. The guy says, "Now wait honey! A drunk at the bar puked on me but he gave me this 10 dollar bill to get my shirt cleaned". And he hands her the bill. She looks at it and says, "But this is a 20 dollar bill!". The guy replies, "Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you. He also shit in my pants!!!"
