I had a similar situation and it took over 20 years to finally get to the bottom of it......
My best friend was dating what i could see was her perfect man, he was tall and hansom,funny and hard working so i suggested to her he was a keeper and she should get married i even set the date with her and booked the chapel.
Money was tight so i chipped as and when i could and even sat with her to write out the guest invites,i see on the list my name was not there but just thought it was not needed as i would be first on her mind,when we went and posted the formal invites again i never see one for me and just thought it would be given by hand but that never happened.
As the wedding drew closer she got tied up in it all and i some how got pushed to the side so i would just offer support to which one day she snapped at me and said all the pressure was on her and i was more interested in sport than the wedding and the pressure was giving her second thoughts,i done the right thing and assured her i would help more and never mentioned my lack of formal invite,i even sold my little sports car and gave her the money to help pay for things which made her happy so she said,i was extra pissed off when i offered to go pick out a dress with her and she chose her sister over me,not sure what that was all about as she sister was a right old slapper and half the town had rode her round the block not once not twice but trice,she even flirted with me but i could not betray my friend in such a way,not my type, anyway i was never in to twisted sister.
The day of the wedding come and i still had no formal invite and she even refused to see me,this is when i thought to myself no enough is enough i am going to that damn wedding if she likes it or not,i had helped pay for it and i for sure was not missing it,i dusted down a outfit had a few drinks i admit for courage purposes as what i was going to say could in no way be taken back i was committed to this.
So i got there early and thought i would make myself seen and took center stage,as soon as she started to walk down i could see she was ready to have her say as she had a cocky walk about her,there was silence and we had a exchange of words,it all happened so quick and i had vowed to do something but in the heat of the moment i cant remember what,and then at the wedding reception she was all smiles and no more was said.
Fast forward 20 odd years and yes we are still so called friends,we still meet up for breakfast but the conversations are limited, i make my excuses and rush off to work.
Anyway it all come to a boiling point late last year when i accidentally forgot to give her a anniversary card,i would forget quite often but this year she was super pissed off, she started by giving me the silent treatment and by time i realized what i had forgot she was in a frenzy of rage, she called me at work and started shouting down the phone,when i came out of work my car was scratched all down one side,i had worked hard for this little sports car in fact it took years to save up for and she had clearly forgot i had sold the last one to help pay for her wedding the ungrateful cow.
So i headed home and yup there she was waiting on the door step and she started shouting and raving,i said lets go inside and as neighbors were listening,she shouted abuse at the neighbors which was not very nice.
Then she looked at me and said how could i forget her anniversary,how could i forget such a thing,she even pointed out that we were once both best friends and thats when i dragged up the past and asked her straight why she never gave me a formal invite to the wedding and her reply was this.....
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"BECAUSE YOU WERE THE FUCKING GROOM YOU MORON"
we have never spoken of this issue again.
I still think it would have been nice to have got a formal invite.
Live and learn.
